Something Worth Fighting For
by Zeppleingirl08
Summary: Set after Fault. Elliot is divorced. He loves Olivia. She loves him. But years of pent up emotions are keeping Olivia from allowing herself to be happy. Will Elliot be able to prove to her that she is worth it after all? Or will she walk away forever?
1. Prologue

**A/N: As promised, here is the next story I'll be working on. This chapter is pretty short and is kind of more of a prologue then an actual first chapter but I hope you like it still. Here's what I can tell you so far about the story without giving it all away:**

**The story is set right after the episode "Fault" when Gitano almost killed Elliot. In this story, Elliot is officially divorced from Kathy at this point so he is single. Instead of the talk they had at the end of the episode where Elliot told Olivia he didn't think they could be partners anymore, they just talked about the case and then Elliot followed her out. Read on to see what happens with that.**

**But also some other background information, up to this point Olivia has been pretending to be strong for everyone. But deep down she is really struggling with her place in life, most importantly her place at work and also who she is as a human being. Will Elliot be able to prove to her that there is always something worth fighting for? Or will she push him away forever?**

**Read on to find out.**

**Sorry if that sounded confusing but I hope you can keep up. For all my faithful readers, you know that I'm an E/O shipper at heart and hate that Chris Meloni left the show. So I hope you read on with good faith and know I wouldn't steer you wrong. I hope you enjoy this first part and I'll try and put up the first full Chapter soon :)**

* * *

Olivia rolled out of his arms hoping she wouldn't wake him. He stirred a little before rolling onto his stomach and falling back into a deep sleep. She let out a shaky breath and pushed her legs over the side of his bed and flinched as her bare feet hit the cold floor.

She looked over at the clock and saw that it was 5:17am. Early. To early. She sighed and stood up as she reached for her clothes that were strewn across the floor of his bedroom. It was hard to wrap her head around everything that had happened in the last 24 hours.

Images of the gun pointed at Elliot's head flashed before her eyes and she felt her stomach lurching. She shook her head quickly as she pulled her pants up over her legs and sipped them. The next second she saw herself walking down the hall at the hospital as Elliot ran up behind her.

She closed her eyes and remembered the feel of his hand on her lower back as he met her in the lobby. She remembered the way she had stopped short, confused at first but when she turned to look at him she saw that he wanted the same thing. The next thing she knew, they were at his apartment and he was taking her clothes off, his hands were all over her and she had melted into his embrace.

Her heart burned when she thought about the feeling of his lips on her skin. He made sure he didn't miss any part of her and she remembered the way she trembled, as he loved her in ways she had never felt before…

For the first time in as long as she could remember, she had felt complete in his arms.

But that was last night.

And this was a new day…and life was beginning to catch up to them again. When she had woken up in his arms that morning the first thing she saw was a picture of his four children and she knew this couldn't last.

And so here she was, changing back into the same dirty clothes from the day before getting ready to leave without saying goodbye. Olivia walked out of his bedroom without turning back and made her way towards the front door.

As soon as it clicked shut behind her, Elliot woke up in his bed. He didn't have to roll over to know that she had left. He could have gotten up and run after her, but he felt to defeated to even try.

So instead, he rolled over onto his back and looked at the empty space beside him. His hand reached out to the sheets she had been lying on, they were still warm from her body heat. He began to wonder if he would ever feel her body against his again…

_  
Three days later, Elliot was tired of waiting for her to show her face at work. And truth be told, he was afraid that she would run even further so he decided to confront her. When he got to her apartment, it took a few minutes for him to actually find the courage to knock on the door.

He couldn't help but laugh to himself thinking that he had faced some of the most dangerous criminals in the city and yet he was more scared to face the woman he was in love with.

She opened the door after the second knock, and she didn't look surprised to see him. He tried to smile to show that he wasn't angry which in truth he wasn't. He was just sad…

"And here I was thinking you'd given up…" She said leaning against the doorframe.

Elliot smiled sadly at her. "You should know by now that I don't walk away form a fight. I don't give up that easy…"

She raised her eyebrows. "So we're going to fight?"

He shook his head. "No. Not unless you want to start one."

She sighed and let her shoulders droop and he knew that she wasn't going to fight him, but she wasn't going to give in either. "Elliot I'm sorry that I left like that…I just couldn't face you."

"After all we've been through together you couldn't give me the decency of an explanation?" He asked with sad tired eyes.

She laughed. "El come on…you no I don't have one other than I'm scared."

He reached a hand out to her and touched her arm gently. "So am I. But I'm still here…"

She licked her lips and looked down at his hand on her arm, the images of him touching the rest of her body began to flood her mind again. "You wouldn't understand even if I tried to explain it to you."

He shrugged and stepped closer to her. "Maybe I will…maybe I won't. But we can talk about it. Figure it out together…" He smiled at her, that smile that always broke her. "Just like we always do…"

She felt her heart begin to flutter and she shook her head. "This isn't one of our cases Elliot. This is life…our lives and I don't want to screw yours up."

He chuckled more to himself then to her. "Liv…I find ways to screw up my life on my own. You are usually the one that cleans up the mess. I highly doubt that you will screw it up more than I usually do. If anything…I welcome the chaos you bring."

She laughed and felt her eyes fill up with tears. "This is insane Elliot."

He nodded. "Yeah I guess it is. But most things worth fighting for are."

She cocked her head to the side. "I thought you said there wasn't going to be any fighting…"

He shrugged. "You don't have to fight. But I think I don't have any other choice."

"What are you talking about?" She asked feeling confused by his words.

"I know what I want Olivia." He said walking closer to her, so close that he was only inches from her face.

She swallowed nervously. "And what is that exactly?"

He smiled that smile he only shared with her before he whispered. "I want you Liv…"

Her heart was pounding as she pulled away from again; her eyes begged him to understand. "I'm sorry…"

He hadn't really expected her to give in so easily, but he had hoped she might. "Okay fine…I can take a hint."

He turned his back on her slowly before starting to walk away when she called out to him. "Elliot I really am sorry…please believe me."

Elliot turned and looked at her with a thoughtful glance. "I know you are. Just as I know that you feel the same way about me as I do you."

She grasped the doorframe at her right and looked after him. "What do you-?"

"Like I said…" He smiled again and pushed his hands in his pockets. "You should know by now…I don't give up that easy."

She felt a shiver run up her spine, but it wasn't because of fear. She trusted Elliot with all of her heart but she also knew what he was saying was true. No matter how hard she pushed him away, he wasn't going to turn his back on her. Somewhere deep in her heart she felt the wall she had built around it begin to crack and she wondered if just maybe…he could actually be the one to save her.

He winked again before turning away and making his way towards the elevator. She watched him until the elevator doors closed, and then she walked back into her apartment. She closed the door and walked over to couch where she had been hiding for three days.

As she pulled the blankets up over her, she tried to keep the screaming in her head from taking over. It was all too much to handle, and for the first time in her life she actually felt afraid.

It wasn't Elliot she was afraid of.

No…she could never fear him. The thing she feared was herself. Over the years she had realized she was capable of complete destruction if left to her own defenses. She wanted to believe that times had changed…that she could finally let herself be happy.

But she had a sick feeling that she couldn't do it. But she wished…God did she wish that she could finally let all the anger and frustration go and just live. But time would tell…she just hoped that Elliot had the strength to fight for her like he had promised.

And if he didn't…she was sure this would be the end of her.

* * *

**Hopefully you liked it. If so let me know and I'll update as soon as I can! :) **


	2. Chapter 1

**Hey guys :) I'm glad you liked the prologue! I hope you like the new chapter as well :) **

* * *

A week later Olivia woke up in a cold sweat, screaming at the top of her lungs. Her skin felt cold and clammy as she ran a tired hand through her damp hair trying to catch her breath. She had the same dream as she had been having since the Gitano case. Every time she closed her eyes she saw the gun pointed at Elliot's head but instead of a sniper shooting Gitano, she ended up shooting Elliot in the head.

The shock and pain on his face as the bullet shot towards him made her want to throw up. And most mornings…she usually did even though she was barely eating. Despite an empty stomach the image of Elliot being blown to pieces as a result of her gun made her physically sick.

She reached over to the bedside table and grabbed for the water bottle there, she took a huge swig of water and swished it around her mouth. Then she pulled herself up off the bed and tried to face the day.

She walked into the bathroom and started the shower, making sure the water was as hot as possible. Sometimes she felt that if the water were scalding it would burn away all her pain. As she stepped into the tub, she heard the phone ringing but she didn't care who it was.

Despite not answering it, her message machine picked up the phone and Casey's voice rang through the living room towards her bathroom.

_"Olivia freaking Benson! If you don't show up to work today on time Cragen is going to fire you I swear."_She heard Casey say angrily.

She rolled her eyes as she began to massage her scalp with her favorite shampoo. "Nice try Casey…we both know he wouldn't actually fire me." She grumbled.

_"And I'm bringing you breakfast whether you like it or not. I know you haven't been eating…I don't know what's going on with you but you better pull it together." Casey said as she continued to ramble on._

Olivia looked down at her stomach and saw that she had in fact lost a few pounds. She had always been concerned with her appearance but hated the look of these girls that were all skin and bones. Unfortunately…she was becoming one of those girls. The problem was…she couldn't seem to hold anything down if she was hungry which was rare. Most of the time she was too sad and frustrated to even care about eating at all.

_"If I don't see you at the precinct by nine I'm personally driving to your apartment and dragging you out of bed." Casey threatened as she hung up._

Olivia couldn't help but smile, she would like to see Casey try and drag her out of bed. They both knew that Olivia was the stronger of the two and could easily kick Casey's ass.

When she was done with her shower, she wrapped herself in her towel and avoided all mirrors. She didn't want to see the bruises and cuts on her body from the last few cases, especially the red line across her neck where Gitano had cut her.

She shivered as her towel hit the floor, she grabbed the first thing she saw in the closet and threw it on. She ran a hairbrush quickly through her hair and dried it. She didn't even attempt to put make up because quite frankly she didn't care, everyone knew about the cuts and bruises there was no use trying to hide them.

She locked up her apartment and hailed a cab hoping that today would be better than the rest of the week had been so far. Elliot was being more gracious than usual even though she tried to avoid him at all costs. He wasn't kidding when he said he wasn't going to give up that easy…

When she finally got to the precinct, she rode the elevator upstairs and tried to ignore the nausea rumbling in her stomach. Casey was right…she really had to snap out of it. Whatever was going on with her was taking a serious toll on her body and her mind.

When the elevator doors opened, she saw Munch and Fin arguing through the double doors at their desk. She smiled to herself feeling strangely comforted by their bickering.

She felt safe here.

When she walked through the doors and threw her bag on the desk, all eyes turned to her and she felt the blush creep up in her cheeks. "What?" She bit back at them.

Munch raised an eyebrow at her. "We're just surprised to see you on time this morning Detective."

She smirked at him and pulled her chair out. "Yeah, yeah…whatever."

Fin waited until Olivia had sat down before replying to her. "I see you are in a pleasant mood again today."

She shrugged. "No worse then usual."

Elliot smiled at her trying to show his support and concern. "Ignore Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dee…" He said rolling his eyes. "They are having another lovers quarrel and want to put the focus on someone else."

Olivia couldn't help but laugh at his comment, damn him for being so charming. She lifted her eyes towards his and she saw that secret smile that was saved for her and she felt a shiver run up her spine. She turned away from him to try and hide the pain in her eyes as image of the gun at his head mixed with the image of his hands all over her body.

She tried to muster up the courage to say something back to him but thankfully Casey walked into the office to save her. Although…once she saw the look on Casey's face she wasn't sure if she would be saving her as much as pushing her to her breaking point.

"I see you got my message this morning." Casey said putting a box of donuts and a large coffee on Olivia's desk.

Olivia rolled her eyes and shuffled some papers on her desk. "Oh yes…your shrill voice rang through my apartment and ruined my peace in the shower."

Casey put her hand on her hip and smirked. "Well I wouldn't have had to make that angry phone call if you had just called me back last night."

Olivia looked up at her friend. "I fell asleep. Sorry."

Casey clicked her tongue and pushed the box of donuts closer to her. "Well…at least you got some rest finally."

Olivia gave her a warning look because she knew that the rest of her friends, including Elliot were listening intently. "Rest? Sure…we can call it that if you want."

Casey shrugged and opened the top of the box of donuts. "Okay…so now which one are you starting with?"

Olivia looked at her dumfounded. "Starting with?"

Casey smiled at her and reached for a napkin as she put a Boston Crème donut in front of her. "Yes. You are entirely too skinny…you need to eat at least six of these to put some meat on your bones."

Olivia laughed and pushed away from her desk. "Six donuts? No way! Give them to the guys…they can have them."

Munch stood up and stole the donut off of Olivia's desk and took a bite. "While I appreciated the offer Olivia…I agree with Casey. You do look a little too skinny."

Olivia leaned against the coffee table in the corner and shrugged as she lifted her coffee cup to her lips. "I didn't ask for your opinion Detective Munch."

"I guess you didn't…but I still voiced it. Have you been eating?" He asked her with a hint of concern in his voice.

She nodded. "I've been eating."

Fin rolled his eyes. "Please…yesterday I brought you your favorite sub from Gianni's and you didn't even touch it."

Her eyes moved towards him. "So what? I just wasn't that hungry. I said I'd pay for it even though I didn't eat it."

"I don't want your money Olivia…I just want to make sure you are okay." He said softly.

Olivia cleared her throat and then poured her coffee in the trash. "I'm fine. And everyone needs to stop worrying about me." She threw the cup into the trash and walked past everyone and made her way out of the office much to everyone's dismay.

Casey sighed and sat down in Olivia's chair. "What the hell is going on with her?" She asked as she took a donut out of the box for herself.

"Ever since that damn Gitano case she has been in such a funk." Munch said as he made his way back towards his desk.

"Has she said anything to you?" Fin asked as he looked over at Elliot.

Elliot felt his heart leap in his chest because he knew that he couldn't tell everyone that he and Olivia had slept together. "No. Not really."

"I saw you leaving the hospital with her that night." Munch said curiously. "She didn't say anything at all to you?"

Elliot shook his head and put on his best poker face. "No. I just offered to drive her home so she didn't have to take a cab. I think she's just tired…it happens to all of us at some point. We get burnt out…just cut her some slack."

Casey huffed and took another bite of her donut. "I just hope she can pull it together without putting her job in jeopardy."

"Please…Captain wouldn't fire her even if IAB demanded it." Fin said rolling his eyes. "You know she's his favorite…"

"That is true." Don said as he walked into the main office and stole a donut of his own from Olivia's desk. "Where is she anyway?"

"She looked like she was heading for the cribs." Munch said to his boss.

Don sighed. "I'll go talk to her."

Elliot pushed himself away from his desk and stood up. "No. Let me Cap. I'll see if I can figure out what's bothering her."

Don stared at him nervously for a moment before nodding in agreement. "Alright. Just don't piss her off."

Elliot laughed and walked out of the main office and towards the cribs. He took the steps two at a time hoping that he could find a way to break through to her and make her finally see that he was there for her unconditionally. He pushed the door open slowly and peeked his head into the room; he saw her sitting on the bed in the corner.

She wasn't crying…but she still looked sad. "Liv?" He whispered.

Olivia turned to look at him, she tried to tell herself she wanted to be alone but deep down she knew that having him there was exactly what she wanted. "Hey El."

He took her response as a signal that it was okay to enter the room. He shut the door behind him and walked over to her on the bed. He raised an eyebrow as if to ask if it was okay for him to sit beside her and she just nodded slowly.

Letting out a shaky breath, he sat down next to her. "Cap wanted to come up and talk to you…but I thought it would be better if it was me."

She sighed. "He probably thinks I'm going crazy."

He smiled at her. "He doesn't think you are going crazy Olivia…"

She looked over at him and stared for a moment before asking. "Do you?"

He sighed and reached a hand out to her to show his concern. "No. I just think you're struggling with something. And I wish that you would let me know what's going on so I could help you."

She licked her lips when she felt the tears burning in the back of her eyes again. "It's like I told you El…I don't know what's going on with me. If I could explain it to you I would but I'm just so messed up that I can't even figure it out for myself."

Elliot nodded slowly and squeezed her hand. "Well start from the beginning…"

She shook her head and pulled her hand away form him as she got up off the bed. "I don't know where the beginning of all this is Elliot. I feel like it's just been my whole life bottling up around me and now I'm about to explode."

He watched her pace the room and knew this was a more serious issue than he had realized. "Olivia…"

"I just feel like I'm literally at the end of my rope you know? I don't know how much more I can take." She said feeling her head begin to spin again.

Elliot pushed himself off the bed and walked towards her, he grabbed her arm gently. "Slow down Olivia…"

She looked down at his hand on her arm and she felt her body temperature rise. "Don't do that…"

He was confused by her words but his eyes followed hers to where he held her arm. "Don't do what?"

She pulled her arm out of his grasp and backed away. "Don't act all sweet and caring like that…it only confuses me more."

He looked up at her and started to notice that everyone was right, she was getting to skinny. He pushed the thought out of his mind because he knew that saying anything would only make her more upset.

"Why does it confuse you? I told you what my intentions were Olivia…" He whispered to her hoping she would understand.

Olivia shook her head. "Elliot I can't. I just can't do this."

"Can't do what? Work here? Or be with me?" He asked stepping closer to her.

Her heart was pounding in her chest and she felt dizzy again. "El please…just don't."

"Olivia I know you're afraid…of what I'm not entirely sure. But I'm here for you. Why can't you see that?" He asked her.

She bit her lip feeling nervous. "I just…I don't believe that you really care about me Elliot."

The words hit him like a ton of bricks and he tried to fight the bitter words he wanted to hurl at her. He was offended that she wouldn't be able to see how much she meant to him. But he knew he couldn't fight with her, he couldn't use his normal defenses with her. He needed to be patient with her…

"You don't believe that I actually care about you?" He asked in a hoarse whisper.

The emotion in his voice caught her off guard and she had to swallow to push back the tears again. "I mean…no I know you care. But not…I-I just…what I mean is-"

Elliot backed away thinking she needed some space. "If anything I don't think you realize just how much I actually care about you."

She looked down at her feet and kicked at the ground anxiously. "I'm not trying to hurt you." She lifted her eyes to his again. "You know that right?"

He smiled sadly at her. "Yeah. I know…"

She laughed to herself and sat back down on one of the beds. "I don't want to drag you into all my crap El…"

"I've dragged you into enough of mine…it would be only fair." He said smirking down at her.

She looked up at him and smiled. "What am I going to do?"

He shrugged. "I don't know yet. But we will figure it out?"

She raised an eyebrow at him. "We?"

He smiled. "Yes. We. I'm not going anywhere Liv…so you better get used to it."

She smirked. "I usually despise your stubbornness."

"And now?" He asked leaning against the bed frame closest to him.

She smiled again. "Now…I find it strangely comforting…"

He chuckled and walked over to her. "I am going to the twin's soccer game after work. Why don't you come with me? It might help clear your head a little."

She stared up at him as he lingered over her. "Are you sure that's a good idea? I don't want you to get the wrong idea…"

He nodded slowly. "I know you aren't ready for anything more than friendship…let's take one thing at a time okay?"

She sighed happily and nodded. "Okay. I'll go. It will be good to see twins."

He nodded and stuck out his hand for her. "Alright. Well let's get back downstairs before Casey comes looking for you."

Olivia laughed. "I hate her."

He pulled her off the bed and led her towards the door. "No you don't…"

"Just a little…" She whispered as he opened the door for her.

"Okay. Fine…" He said chuckling as he walked out of cribs with her.

He knew they had a long way to go but he felt better knowing she wasn't pushing him away completely. At least she wasn't at the moment…he just hoped it would stay that way.

* * *

Later that day, they left work and went to the soccer field where Lizzie and Dickie were playing in their game. Elliot carried a blanket from the back of his car to the field for them to sit on as his kids took the field. They both smiled and waved at Elliot and Olivia as they took their places.

Olivia smiled. "They look happy…"

Elliot nodded. "Yeah. They've finally started to get used to the fact that Kathy and I aren't together anymore."

"That's good…" Olivia said turning to look at him out of the corner of her eyes. "Casey said things were heating up with her and Andrew."

Elliot shrugged. "Yeah it looks like it…"

She reached for the water bottle near her. "Are you okay with that?"

Elliot turned and smiled at her. "I won't say it isn't weird to see her with someone else." He shrugged. "But it wasn't working with us. And despite everything I want her to be happy…she is the mother of my children after all."

Olivia nodded slowly. "Look at you all grown up…"

He chuckled and looked back at the field. "I figured it was time…"

She took another sip of her water before whispering to him. "Not sure if this is the best place to bring up the other night but I-"

Elliot looked over at her surprised that she wanted to talk about how they had had sex. "We don't have to talk about it if you aren't comfortable with it."

She stared at him for a moment. "I am sorry that I left like that…"

He inhaled deeply before looking back at the field to watch the game. "I won't pretend it didn't hurt. But it's okay."

"How is it okay?" She asked, she felt extremely confused by how calm he was.

"I know that it probably wasn't the smartest decision on my part to let that happen." He said shrugging as he continued to watch the game. "But you weren't the only one that was hurting the night…"

"Do you regret it?" She whispered, even though she already knew the answer.

He turned back to her again and smiled with sincerity. "Not at all." She felt the blush growing on her cheeks as he asked. "Do you?"

She turned away from him and whispered. "No. I can't say I didn't want it to happen…I guess I just wish it had been under different circumstances."

He chuckled. "You mean not after I almost died?"

She grimaced and closed her eyes. "Don't say things like that."

The bite in her voice surprised him but he knew he shouldn't have said what he said. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that…"

She brushed some hair out of her face. "I know. But…I just can't get that image out of my head."

Elliot leaned into her and whispered. "Liv…look at me."

It took her a moment before her eyes opened and she turned to look at him. "What?"

"I'm right here Olivia. I'm alive…" He was staring at her with such intensity it almost frightened her, but somehow in a good way. "If we hold onto that night…we're never going to be able to move forward."

She let her eyes wander over his face, taking in his words and thanking God that he really was alive and well. "But I don't know what we're moving forward too…that's what scares me."

Elliot looked back at the field and saw that his kids were watching him to see if he was paying attention to the game. "Why don't we talk about this later? We were supposed to come here to help clear your head…not talk about all this stuff."

She swallowed hard afraid she had made him angry. "I'm sorry."

But when he turned his head to smile at her, she knew he wasn't angry, he was just trying to look out for her. "Don't apologize."

He winked at her before turning back to the field. She slipped her sunglasses on her head and tried to relax next to him and allow things to fall into place like they were supposed too. However, she couldn't shake the fear that was rising up in her that like always things were going to blow up in her face.

* * *

After the game, Elliot took Olivia and the kids out for Pizza to celebrate the fact that they had won the game. It felt good to be around Elliot's kids, they seemed to always bring a smile to her face. For at least that hour, laughter was keeping away the tears from falling down her face from everything she was feeling.

Elliot dropped the kids off at Kathy's and then drove Olivia home. He insisted on walking her upstairs to her apartment despite the fact that she was afraid he would get the wrong idea.

When they reached her door, Olivia turned to him with a nervous smile. "Thanks for today…"

He shrugged and put his hands in his pockets. "It was my pleasure."

"You're a good friend…you know that?" She said cocking her head to the side.

He smiled at her. "Just a friend?"

She laughed and looked down at the floor. "I suppose you and I have never really been just friends."

"No. We definitely haven't." He said trying his best not to smirk.

She smiled and looked back up at him. "I uh…I guess I'll see you tomorrow then?"

He nodded. "Yes you will."

She turned to unlock her door but she felt his eyes still on her, she turned back to him. "Goodnight El."

He leaned forward at for a second she was afraid he was going to kiss her on the lips. She felt her breath catch in her throat as his lips touched against her forehead softly.

"You're going to be okay Olivia…" He whispered against her skin before placing another kiss there. "I promise."

Her heart practically did a back flip in her chest when he pulled away. He flashed that special smile of his at her before turning around and walking away from her apartment. Olivia took a deep breath and walked into her apartment, locking the door behind her.

Her message machine was beeping so she pressed the button as she slipped her shoes off. She had to laugh to herself as Casey's voice once again rang through her apartment.

_"Hey Benson._ _I'm sorry about this morning…I hope you aren't too mad at me. Word on the street is that you left the precinct with Elliot though. Give me a call when you get home so you can give me the inside scoop." _When the message finished Olivia heard the usual beep as she grabbed for her phone.

Casey picked up after the second ring. _"I was afraid you were going to fall asleep before calling me back again."_

Olivia laughed. "Nope. I'm wide-awake. What's up?"

_"I can tell." Casey said. "Are you mad at me about this morning? I didn't mean to bombard you like that…I just wanted to make sure you were okay."_

Olivia sighed and collapsed onto her couch, pulling a blanket up around her. "I know. I'm not mad at you…just frustrated."

_"About what?" Casey asked._ _"You know you can tell me anything Olivia…"_

She smiled as she talked to her best friend. "I know Casey. And I'm not trying to keep anything from you or anyone else…I've just been feeling off lately. It's a lot of things really…thing that I have been to afraid to deal with."

_"And I bet the Gitano case didn't really make things any easier for you." Casey said. "I heard what happened in the warehouse…"_

Olivia leaned her head back against the sofa and closed her eyes. "I can't get the image of that gun pressed against Elliot's head out of my head…"

_"It wasn't your fault if that's what your thinking." Casey said honestly. "And Elliot's okay right? You shouldn't dwell on it…"_

Olivia took a deep breath before responding. "Casey if I tell you something do you swear it will stay between us?"

_"Of course. What's going on?" Casey asked curiously._

She sat up on the couch and pulled her legs up against her chest. "I slept with Elliot."

_Olivia heard Casey drop something on the other end of the phone before she gasped. "You did what?"_ _  
_  
Olivia groaned and fell back on the couch again. "After we left the hospital that night…Elliot met me in the lobby. And the next thing I knew we were at his place…in his bed…"

_"Whoa." Casey said still completely shocked by Olivia's confession. "I knew something was going on but I didn't know it was this. When Elliot went to talk to you up in the cribs today…did you guys-?"_

"No!" Olivia said adamantly. "It's not like that…I left the next morning without even saying goodbye."

_"Why?" Casey asked even more shocked by that then the fact that they had slept together._

"There are a lot of reasons. One…I'm not good at relationships. And two…I'm not in a place in my life where being in a relationship would be smart. I'm so screwed up right now…and three…it's Elliot!" Olivia practically yelled into the phone.

_"Please…you can't tell me that you don't have feelings for him." Casey said laughing on the other end of the phone._

"Of course I care about him Casey…but I can't be with him." Olivia said sighing as she pulled herself up off the couch and walked towards the kitchen. "It would never work."

_"You don't know that." Casey said. "You're just afraid."  
_  
"I'm not afraid of him though…it's me." Olivia said sadly as she poured herself a glass of wine.

_"So what are you going to do then? I mean how is Elliot handling all this?" Casey asked thinking about how Elliot was so calm at work the last week._

"That's the weird thing…he's so calm. And he keeps telling me to take things one day at a time. That h won't give up that easy…" She said as she leaned against her counter and took a sip of her wine. "It's definitely not how I expected him to act."

_"Awww…he loves you Olivia!" Casey said with glee in her voice._

Olivia couldn't help but smile at the thought of it. "But what if loves isn't enough?"

_She heard Casey sigh softly. "Sometimes you just have to take a chance Olivia."_

"You know I'm not good at that…and this would be even harder. Elliot's been my best friend for seven years and I don't' want to jeopardize our relationship." She said as she lifted her glass to her lips.

_"Well I hate to break it to you Olivia…whether you decide to be with Elliot or not your relationship has changed forever. There's no going back now…" Casey said honestly._

Olivia swallowed her wine and sighed. "Yeah…I know."

_"It sounds like Elliot has told you how he feels…so I guess it's up to you to decide where your relationship goes from here." Casey said._

She placed her glass on the counter and sighed. "Casey I just don't think I have the strength to deal with this. I don't want to fight with him…I don't want things to change."

_"Something's are worth fighting for Olivia…" Casey whispered._

Olivia rested her head against the cabinet behind her head and closed her eyes. She knew deep down Elliot was worth fighting for…but she just didn't think she could let go of her fears. And even though he said he wasn't going anywhere, she wasn't sure she would be able to keep from hurting him when she was trying to protect herself.

She seemed to always have a way of saying and doing things without thinking about the consequences first…

* * *

**I hope you liked the chapter. I will try and update as soon as possible!  
**


	3. Chapter 2

**Hope you like chapter 2, I'll try and update soon! **

* * *

A couple of days later, Olivia was at work early in the morning trying to finish up some paper work. Her head was pounding because she hadn't slept in almost two days but she wanted to finish her work before she went home. She ran a tired hand through her hair as Elliot walked over to her desk.

"Did you even go home this last night when I left?" He asked taking his jacket off and throwing it on his desk chair.

She looked up at him and couldn't hold back the yawn she was holding in any longer. "No. I was trying to get all this paper work done so I could have the rest of the weekend off."

Elliot sighed and walked over to her desk. "You've been here for three days straight Liv…go home."

He tried to pull at her papers but she put her hand over it. "I'm almost done. It's fine. I'll go home when I finish okay?"

He stared down at her for a moment and saw the bags under her eyes. He had been doing his best to keep his distance from her so she could have her space but he was seriously getting worried about her. He licked his lips and knelt down beside her desk and tried to reason with her.

"I can finish the paper work if you want." He whispered to her.

She smiled at him but shook her head. "No seriously. I'm almost done. Don't worry about it."

Elliot chuckled and shook his head. "You are something…"

She looked over at him, confused and somewhat surprised by his words. "What?"

He sighed and stood up as he walked around to his desk and sat down. "You're just extremely stubborn that's all…"

She squinted her eyes at him before responding, "And you aren't?"

He shrugged. "I guess since we're partners we've rubbed off on each other over the years."

She looked back down at her desk and tried to ignore him. "I just want to finish this all up before I go home okay? I need a few days off without working on any of this crap."

He nodded and reached for the papers in his file. "Okay. Fair enough."

She looked up at him and wondered why he wasn't pressing her on the matter anymore but decided not to question it. She was tired, irritable and still unsure where her relationship with Elliot was at the moment. She pulled her sweater closer to her body, suddenly feeling cold despite the fact that it was late May and the temperature was slowly rising.

Elliot glanced up at her again before clearing his throat. "Since you won't have any work this weekend do you have any big plans?"

She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear before shaking her head. "No. You?"

Elliot smiled. "Actually I'm going to New Hampshire with the kids and my Mom. My Aunt has a lake house up there and since it's the first week of summer vacation I'm taking the week off."

For some reason, the idea of him leaving the city made her feel lonely. They lived on opposites ends and yet she always felt comforted knowing that he was close enough to her if she needed him. She hated to admit that she truly did need him as much as she did, but she was beginning to realize she might not be able to fight it much longer. And with everything that was going on with them at the moment, she was surprised he would leave when he was so hell bent on proving to her that he wanted to be with her. She was beginning to feel more confused than ever…

"That should be fun. I bet the kids will be glad to spend sometime with you." She said shooting him a small smile again before looking down at her desk again.

He stood up and walked over to get a cup of coffee from the nearby table. "Yeah. I'm looking forward to it. We used to visit my Aunt's house all the time when I was a kid and I haven't seen her in awhile. The kids love her too and I haven't had a full week off with them in a long time."

Olivia flipped one of her papers over to the start the backside and nodded. "I bet it will be a nice break."

Elliot leaned against the table and took a sip of his coffee. "Do you want to come with us?"

At first she wasn't sure she had heard him right, she wondered if she was beginning to hallucinate. "What?"

He walked back over to his desk and sat down again before repeating himself. "I said…do you want to come with us?"

She opened her mouth to say something and yet no words seemed to formulate, her cheeks began to flush as she shook her head before whispering. "No. I don't…I think that…that's not a good idea."

He leaned his elbows on the desk and smiled, knowing it was going to be hard for her to refuse the offer. "Why wouldn't it be a good idea?"

She licked her lips and tried to remember to breath, but the idea of going on vacation with Elliot and his family made her mind begin to wander. She had images of actually being with Elliot…getting married and truly being a part of their family. Maybe even having a child of their own.

But no. That could never happen. That wasn't her life…she wasn't that lucky.

"Just…our situation at the moment Elliot," She looked back up at him feeling extremely drained. "I don't want you to think-"

"I won't think anything." Elliot said shaking his head. "I won't pretend that I wouldn't like to repeat the other night…"

She sighed and shook her head. "Elliot…"

"But I care enough about you to know that you need a friend right now. And so…I'm willing to put that part of our relationship on the back burner for the time being and just try and help you." He shrugged and smiled that beautiful smile of his. "I think getting away for a few days might make you feel better."

Her hand slid to the back of her neck and massaged it gently. "I don't know…"

"See…you really are stubborn." He said smirking at her, knowing how much his words would bother her.

She shot a look back up at him that made him realize she wanted to prove him wrong. "Okay fine. I'll go with you." She said quickly, trying to ignore the voice in her head that was warning her this was the worst idea ever. "What time are you picking me up?"

Elliot smiled and leaned back in his chair. "We're leaving tonight at six."

She nodded and pushed her chair away form her desk. "Well then it's a good thing I'm done with my paperwork. I can head home now and get a few hours of sleep and still have time to pack before you pick me up."

He watched her walk around her desk to reach for her coat. "The kids will be very excited that you are coming with us."

She felt a knot growing in her stomach but she just smiled and slid her coat on. "I'll see you at six?"

He smirked and nodded his head quickly. "See you at six."

Olivia turned away from him quickly because she was afraid her facial expression would give her away. She walked as fast as she could to the elevator, and as soon as the doors closed behind her she took out her phone and dialed Casey's number.

_"Hey Olivia. What's up?" She asked._

Luckily, no one else was in the elevator so she leaned against the wall and groaned. "I think I just made a huge mistake."

_"What did you sleep with Fin or Munch now?" Casey teased_

"Ha! Ha!" Olivia growled into the phone. "Of course not. Elliot invited me to go to New Hampshire with him and the kids this weekend and I said yes."

_"You're going away with him for the weekend?" Casey asked completely shocked by Olivia's statement. "What does this mean?"_

Olivia sighed and put her hand on her head as she walked out of the elevator and went to go hail a cab outside. "I don't know! He asked and I tried to say no but he kept pressing the matter and saying I was stubborn."

_"Oh so you wanted to prove him wrong? And the best way to do that was to go on vacation with him where there will be ample opportunities for you to sleep with him again?" Casey started to laugh. "Smooth move Benson…"_

Olivia slid into a cab and gave him her address before continuing to talk to Casey. "First of all…his kids are going to be there so nothing is going to happen. But second of all…you know I say things without thinking all the time! I can't help it!"

_"That's true. You do have word vomit a lot…" Casey said continuing to laugh._

"Casey stop laughing! This is serious! What the hell am I going to do?" Olivia asked desperately.

_"Well you can cancel on him now." She said sighing. "I think you're still going to have to go…and maybe it will be a good thing."_

"How could this be a good thing?" Olivia asked frantically.

_"Because maybe it will make things more clear for you. Maybe you will figure out whether or not you want to be with him or not." Casey suggested._

"Or maybe it will only complicate things a million times more." Olivia said groaning and resting her head on the back of the seat.

_"I think you should go and try and make the most of it. Maybe getting away will help you clear your head a bit…not about things regarding him but whatever you're trying to work on with yourself. And you love his kids…they'll keep you laughing anyway." Casey said._

Olivia sighed. "Yeah I guess…I just don't really want to give Elliot the wrong idea you know? I told him I didn't know what I wanted and then if I go away with him what if he thinks I want to be with him?"

_"I think Elliot knows you're in no place to be in a relationship. But that doesn't' mean he doesn't want to be there for you. Just try and go into this with an open mind…" Casey said trying to console her._

"I think I'm going to be sick…" She whispered making the cab driver glance at her in the rear view mirror nervously.

_Casey laughed again. "Look I have to go into the court room for a trial. I don't know how long it is going to take but you better keep me updated this weekend."_

"Oh I'm sure I'll be calling you at all hours of the day and night this weekend." Olivia said as the cab pulled up in front of her apartment, paid the cab driver and stepped out onto the sidewalk.

_"Well I hope that your nights will be present with a certain Detective Stabler…in his bed." Casey said bluntly._

"Casey I hate you so much!" Olivia yelled as she walked up the steps to her building.

_"Have fun on the drive to New Hampshire!" Casey said before hanging up the phone._

Olivia laughed nervously and put her phone in her bag and took the elevator up to her floor. When she got into her apartment she went straight to her room and collapsed on the bed, hoping to get a few hours of sleep before it was time for Elliot to pick her up. But she had the feeling…sleep would be hard to come by.

* * *

Later that afternoon, Elliot swung by his apartment and picked up his bag before going to get his kids. His Mom was already at his Aunts house because she had been spending a few weeks with her. Kathy agreed to trade cars with him so he could have the suburban to fit all the kids comfortable in for the long ride.

He pulled up in front of his old house and walked up the front steps, Kathy greeted him at the door. "Hey Elliot."

"Hey. Is everyone ready?" Elliot asked her.

"Almost. They are just throwing a few last minute things in their bags I think. And I told them they had to finish cleaning their rooms before they leave. They seem really excited." She said leaning against the doorframe.

Elliot smiled. "Good. I'm excited too. It should be fun and it will be good to spend a few days with them…"

She looked at him for a moment. "You look nervous. Is everything okay?"

He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. "Can we talk for a minute before the kids come down?"

Kathy nodded and stepped out onto the porch and shut the door behind him. "Sure. What's up?"

Elliot walked over to the railing and leaned against it. "I probably should have called you and run it by you first…but I didn't really plan on this anyway." He looked over at Kathy who just stared at him expectantly. "I sort of invited Olivia to come with us…is that okay?"

Kathy stared at her ex-husband for a second and smiled. "Are you two together now?"

He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm not really sure…"

Kathy laughed and leaned against the side of her house. "What did you do?"

He glared at her. "I didn't do anything…I mean not really."

Kathy cocked her head to the side. "What does that mean?"

"We had a really tough case…and it broke us both down. We both had to decide between saving each other or saving our victims and both time we chose each other." He whispered.

Kathy nodded. "Why is that surprising?"

"It's not…" He shrugged. "It's just complicated…"

Kathy sighed and walked closer to him. "Look Elliot…I won't pretend that I haven't been jealous of Olivia for a long time. But I made peace with our divorce and I'm really happy with Andrew. I want you to be happy too and I think Olivia could make you happy."

He stared at her for a moment. "I never betrayed our marriage Kathy…I want you to know that. I did love you…and in some ways I still do. I never expected to fall for Olivia…"

Kathy nodded and smiled at him. "I know."

"Well we sort of slept together after that case…" He blurted out quickly.

Kathy took a deep breath and crossed her arms across her chest. "And then what?"

"And then nothing…" Elliot said shaking his head sadly. "She left the next morning without saying anything. And when I tried to talk to her she just said that she wasn't ready for a relationship and that she was going through some things…"

Kathy nodded. "Last time I saw her she seemed kind of out of it…"

"I don't know what is going on and I feel bad. I want to help her and I'm really trying but its not really working. And then I just asked her to come with us…I'm worried it's a bad idea." He said honestly.

"I know Olivia…she wouldn't do anything stupid in front of the kids. She loves them. So maybe it will be a good thing…maybe it will make her see that she does want to be with you." Kathy said shrugging.

"Do you really believe that?" He asked her curiously.

Kathy smiled and laughed at him. "Why do you think I've been so jealous all these years Elliot? I've known from the day she became your partner that she had feelings for you…but she is pretty hard to hate. And I can't blame her…she does have good taste."

Elliot chuckled. "Thank you? I think…"

She smiled and reached a hand out to touch his arm gently. "Just take it one day at a time…let Olivia know that you do care. But don't push her…you know she is a bit fragile at the moment so you don't want to push her away."

He inhaled sharply and nodded. "I guess. But you are really okay with her coming this weekend?"

Kathy nodded and smiled. "Of course. She's always been great to the kids and they adore her…besides it sounds like she is going to be around for the long run so they might as well get used to hanging out with her."

Elliot smiled. "You think it will actually work out for me and Olivia?"

Kathy nodded. "Yeah. I do Elliot…I really do."

He was about to say something when the front door burst open and an excited Dickie came running towards them. "Mom! I finished cleaning my room!"

"Did you actually clean or did you throw everything in the closet?" Kathy asked turning towards her son.

Dickie was quiet for a moment before answering. "Does it really matter? Everything is off the floor…"

Both Kathy and Elliot started to laugh; she shook her head and pulled her son in for a hug. "I suppose I can let it slide this time. As long as you promise to actually put everything away when you get home."

Dickie sighed and pulled out of his Mom's hug, "Fine."

Elliot chuckled. "Go throw your bag in the car buddy and we'll wait for your sisters."

Dickie smiled and ran towards the car. "Bye Mom!"

"Bye buddy. Be good and have fun! Love you!" She called after him as the girls walked out the front door.

"Hey Dad." Maureen said smiling at her Dad as he pulled her in for a hug. "All ready to go?"

Elliot nodded. "Yeah. Say bye to Mom and we'll hit the road."

The girls all hugged Kathy and went to pack up the car as Elliot turned back to her. "You going to be okay?" Kathy asked him.

Elliot nodded. "You know me…I can handle anything."

She rolled her eyes and started to walk towards the door. "Okay…keep telling yourself that Elliot."

He smiled at her as she opened the front door. "Thank you Kathy…"

She nodded and smiled at him. "Like I said…I want you to be happy Elliot."

Elliot took a deep breath and walked back to the car where his kids were already arguing about who got to sit where. He laughed and took Lizzie's bag and threw it in the way back before walking to the side of the car.

"Hey! Hey! Way to loud guys. It's a long ride, we can switch seats along the way so you can all sit where you want to sit." He said pulling Dickie off of Kathleen as he tried to wrestle her for one of the window seats.

"Fine." Kathleen said sliding over to the middle and rolling her eyes. "Are we heading straight to the Lake House?"

"Actually…we have one stop to make first." He said feeling his heart begin to beat faster in his chest, wondering just what his kids were going to think of this arrangement.

"Where?" Lizzie asked her Dad as he made sure she was strapped into her seat.

"We are going to pick up Olivia because she is coming with us this weekend." He stepped back and looked at all of his kids and noticed that they were all smiling at him. "Are you guys okay with that?"

Dickie cocked his head to the side. "Is Olivia your girlfriend now?"

Elliot couldn't help but laugh. "Um…no. We're friends. Good friends…"

Kathleen rolled her eyes and looked at her brother. "That just means that Dad hasn't been able to get her to go out with him yet."

Elliot smirked at his daughter. "Alright, alright…let's get going."

"See…he's to much of a chicken to ask Olivia out." Kathleen said continuing to laugh at her father.

Elliot just shook his head and shut the car door before walking around to the drivers seat. As he pulled out of the driveway, he couldn't help but wonder just what he had gotten himself into.

* * *

At her apartment, Olivia was sitting on the couch staring at her suitcase that was on the floor in front of her. She kept wondering if she should pick up the phone and make up some lame excuse to Elliot so she wouldn't have to go. But she knew Elliot to well…he wouldn't believe any of her excuses and he would show up at her apartment regardless of what she had to say.

When she heard him knock on the door, she practically jumped off the couch. She made herself take a few deep breaths before walking to the door and opened it.

He smiled that sly little smile of his at her and her heart began to melt. "Here at six o'clock sharp."

She smiled at him. "You always have been prompt."

"Did you think I was joking about you coming with us?" He asked peeking into her apartment to see if he saw a bag.

She shook her head. "No I knew you meant it. I have my bag packed…"

He nodded and walked into the door and smiled as he went to get her bag. "Good. The kids are waiting in the car and they can't wait to see you."

Olivia watched him walking back towards her with her bag in his hand. "Elliot…are you sure this is such a good idea?"

He laughed and shook his head. "Oh no…you're not getting out of this Benson. My kids will be crushed if you back out on them."

She smiled sadly and sighed. "I just…don't want to complicate things anymore than they already are."

Elliot shrugged and put her bag down on the ground. "Well we can't exactly uncomplicate them so why don't we just enjoy each others company at the moment?"

She scrunched up her nose and looked down at the ground, "Yeah but-"

"Olivia…" He said gently as he took a step closer to her. "Look at me."

She felt the heat rising in her cheeks as she lifted her face slowly to stare at him. "What?"

"I told you I wasn't going anywhere…and I'm not." He smiled and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm not going to push you…I just want you to smile again Olivia. It's killing me to know that you are going through something right now and you can't confide in me. Don't think of this as me trying to get you to be with me…I'm just trying to be here for you as a friend."

She stared at him for a moment and then took a deep breath. "I suppose there are worse things we could be doing…"

"I mean I have five minutes if you want to run to your room real quick…" Elliot said teasing her.

She groaned and nudged him. "Pig."

He laughed and picked up her bag as he followed her out the apartment door. "Just kidding…"

As she walked down the hallway she couldn't help but wonder just what was going to happen this weekend. When they got to the car, the kids were once again bickering and Olivia couldn't help but laugh at them. No matter what happened, she knew that they would make this all worthwhile.

"Hey Olivia!" Little Lizzie yelled when she saw her and her Dad.

"Hey honey." Olivia said as Elliot put her bag in the way back of the car. "Are you guys excited for this?"

"I can't wait to get to the lake!" Dickie said practically jumping up and down in his seat. "I want to go tubing!"

Olivia smiled as Elliot opened the passenger side door for her. "Sounds fun."

"Are you Dad's girlfriend now?" Dickie asked leaning between the seats to get a better look at her.

Elliot groaned as he slid into the driver seat. "Dickie…"

Olivia started to blush again and she shook her head. "Um…no Dickie. Your Dad and I are just friends."

"Good friends…" Kathleen whispered.

Olivia glanced at Elliot anxiously out of the corner of her eye and he also looked nervous. "Alright guys…That's enough. We have a long drive ahead of us so let's not start arguing before we are even on the road."

Elliot's kids all shared a knowing smile and he said a silent prayer that they wouldn't push Olivia to far. He pulled out of his parking space and took to the road wondering how this was all going to play out.

* * *

Two hours into the drive, all of Elliot's kids had their headphones in and were listening to their own music. Olivia was looking out the window at the scenery as it passed her and Elliot leaned over to turn down the radio so they could talk.

"So…" He whispered to her.

She turned back to him and smiled. "So…"

"To be honest I didn't think you were going to say yes when I asked you to come with us." He said looking over at her with a sly smile.

She glared at him. "You didn't play fair…you knew once you called me stubborn that I was going to give in because I couldn't let you be prove your point."

He shrugged. "What can I say? It's not my fault that I know you so well…"

She shot him a dirty playful look and then looked back out the window. "Whatever."

"You know we have another two hours ahead of us…anything you want to talk about?" He asked curiously.

She bit her lip and looked back at him. "Like what?"

He chuckled and shook his head. "I can take a hint."

She rolled her eyes. "No you can't…" She saw him smile again and she sighed. "I don't know El…things are just so weird for me at the moment. I've never felt this confused before."

He nodded his head and looked over at her quickly before turning back to the road. "Do you think you're going to leave SVU?"

She took a deep breath and let his words sink in. "I don't know…"

Elliot tried to imagine SVU without her but it didn't make sense. He had of course worked there without her before but that seemed like a lifetime ago. He couldn't remember his life before her…and he didn't want to think of a life without her now.

"You're going to make me break in a new partner?" He asked trying to lighten the mood.

She laughed and shook her head. "Don't start looking yet. But…if our relationship takes the road that you are hoping for then we're going to have to split up anyway right?"

He hadn't thought about that. "Yeah…I guess we would."

She turned away form him and looked back out the window again. "I can't imagine not working with you anymore…"

Elliot felt a lump growing in his throat but he tried to ignore it. "It would be weird."

She waited a few moments before turning back to him and whispering. "Do you think it would be worth it?"

Elliot pulled into a gas station to fill up the car and before he got out he smiled at her. "I think you are worth more than you realize Liv…"

She opened her mouth to say something but he just winked and got out of the car to go pay first. Her head was swarming and part of her was screaming that she should just jump out of the car and walk home if she had too.

"My Dad really loves you…" Maureen whispered from the back of the car as the rest of her siblings slept around her.

Olivia instantly knew that Elliot's oldest daughter had been listening into their conversation. "Maureen I-"

"I'm not sure what's going on with you…or what happened between you and my Dad but I do want you two to be together. You make him happy…" She whispered.

Olivia looked at her through the rear view mirror. "It's complicated Maureen…"

Maureen just laughed and leaned her head against the back of her seat. "Mom says most things in life that are important are also very complicated."

Olivia smiled. "Well your Mom is very smart."

Maureen looked out her window and saw that her Dad was walking back towards the car. "I'm just saying…you don't want to wake up one morning and realize that you missed a great opportunity."

Olivia stared at her through the mirror and couldn't help but laugh. "How old are you again?"

Maureen laughed. "Old enough…"

They shared a knowing smile before Elliot slipped back into the car and started it up again. He looked from Olivia to Maureen; surprised to see she was awake.

"What are you two talking about?" He asked curiously.

Maureen smiled at her Dad and then looked back at Olivia. "We're just catching up."

Elliot knew better then to question the two of them so he just smiled and pulled out of the gas station. Olivia took one last look at Maureen in the mirror and then rested her head against her seat to look back out the window.

She wasn't sure what was going to happen this weekend…but she knew that whatever happened it was going to be the beginning of a big change for her. She just wasn't sure if it would end with her in the relationship of a lifetime or heartbreak that she was sure to never get over.

She just hoped that her stubbornness didn't get the best of her…

* * *

**You know what to do! If you want me to update sooner rather than later, send in a review! Thanks :) **


	4. Chapter 3

**Hey guys! Thanks for all the reviews and support :) I really enjoyed writing this chapter so I hope you like it as well! **

* * *

They got to the lake house late that night and Olivia helped Elliot and the kids unpack the car. Lizzie refused to wake up so Elliot carried her in as Bernie introduced Olivia to her sister Lucy.

"It is so good to finally meet you." Lucy said shaking Olivia's hand. "I've heard so much about you over the years I feel like I know you already!"

Olivia blushed. "All good things I hope. Thank you for having me here. Your house is beautiful!"

Lucy smiled at her. "Thank you. My husband built it from the ground up when we first got married God Rest his soul…"

Elliot walked in with Lizzie in his arms and smiled at his Mom and Aunt. "I'm going to put Lizzie to bed. I'll be back down in a minute."

Olivia watched him walk up the stairs with Lizzie as the rest of the kids followed before she turned back to Bernie and Lucy. "I can show you to your room if you'd like." Lucy said to her. "You and Elliot will be staying in the two bedrooms down here."

Olivia sighed with relief when she realized there was enough rooms for everyone. On the way here her mind had begun to wonder about their sleeping arrangements.

"That would be great. Thanks." Olivia said as she picked up her bag from the floor.

"I'll go help Elliot and make sure the kids are all settled in." Bernie said walking towards the stairs. "It's good to see you again Olivia." She said as she threw her a smile.

"You too Mrs. Stabler." Olivia said smiling back.

Bernie stopped at the bottom of the stairs and chuckled. "Oh please! Call me Bernie!"

When she walked up the stairs, Lucy led Olivia towards the hallway where her bedroom would be. "My husband John wanted to make sure there would be room for all of our friends and family." She chuckled as she opened the door to Olivia's room. "There's six bedrooms so Lizzie and Dickie will share a room and so will Kathleen and Maureen. Such sweet kids."

Olivia walked into the room behind her and looked around the quaint room. "They really are. Do you have any kids of your own?"

Lucy smiled sadly and shook her head. "Unfortunately that wasn't in the cards for me and my husband…" She said closing one of the windows to ward off the breeze coming off of the lake.

Olivia swallowed the lump in her throat and put her bag on her bed. "Oh. I'm sorry I didn't mean too-"

Lucy shook her head and walked closer to Olivia, reaching out to grab her hand she just smiled "Oh it's okay. Don't you apologize sweetie. Besides…I had Elliot he was like my son. He spent two weeks here every summer and it was the best weeks of the year for John and me. We loved him to pieces…"

Olivia smiled at her. "He seems very fond of you as well."

Lucy smiled and patted Olivia's hand gently. "I'll tell you what…it sure is good to see him smiling again. After the divorce I was afraid he'd never be happy again but he seems to be getting back into the swing of things with you around…"

Olivia's cheek blushed again and she looked away from Lucy. "Oh…I…I mean Elliot is a great friend of mine and I-"

Lucy chuckled. "Relax Olivia…I know you two are only friends. I only meant that it's good to know that he has someone he can count on like you."

Olivia smiled at him. "He's always been there for me…I've tried to do the same for him."

"Well he appreciates it and so do Bernie and I." Lucy said leaning into hug Olivia. "But you must be exhausted after that long ride…I'll leave you to get ready for bed. We're having waffles in the morning but everyone usually sleeps in so don't think you need to get up to early!"

Olivia watched her walk to the door as she sat down on her bed. "Thank you Lucy. I'm looking forward to it!"

Lucy just winked at her as she shut the door to let Olivia get ready for bed. When she was alone, Olivia took a deep breath and reached into her bag to find something comfortable to wear.

* * *

Elliot climbed back down the stairs after all his kids were asleep and he smiled at his Aunt. She was cleaning up the teacups that her and Bernie had used as he walked into the kitchen to see her.

"The troops are fast asleep…" He said putting a gentle hand on her back.

Lucy smiled. "Good. They'll need their energy this week."

Elliot smiled and leaned against the counter. "Where's Olivia?"

"Oh I showed her to her room. She must be getting ready for bed by now." Lucy dried her hands off and leaned against the sink before turning to her nephew. "She seems even more amazing then you've led me to believe…"

His smile grew wider just thinking about her as he looked down at the floor. "Yeah…she's pretty special."

"So when are you two tying the knot?" She teased making Elliot laugh. "You can get married in the backyard if you're up for it."

He laughed again and shook his head. "You always were one step ahead of me." He looked back at her. "Is it that obvious that there is something going on between us?"

Lucy rolled her eyes. "I may be old Elliot…but I'm not stupid."

He sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. "You know I love you Auntie Lu but…do me a favor and just keep it quiet okay? Our relationship is complicated to say the least and Olivia is going through some things at the moment. I don't want to make her uncomfortable and I don't want the kids to get the wrong idea in case it doesn't work out."

Lucy nodded her head and walked over to him, she leaned up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek gently. "Whatever you say Elliot. My lips are sealed." She started to walk towards the stairs before she turned back to him. "I expect you to be up to help me with the waffles tomorrow Mister." She said pointing a finger at him. "Don't sleep in to late."

He chuckled. "Waffle making is our thing Auntie Lu…of course I'll be up!"

She winked at him and nodded. "See you in the morning sweetie. Love you."

"Love you too." He said as he watched her walk upstairs before he made his way down the hallway.

He threw his bag in his own room before walking to Olivia's bedroom to check in on her. He knocked on the door gently waiting for an answer; Olivia opened the door wearing a pair of baggy sweat pants and a tank top. There was nothing fancy about she looked as beautiful as ever to him.

She smiled gently. "Hey…"

He cleared his throat to try and snap him out of his daze before shoving his hands in his pockets. "Hey…just wanted to check in and see that you were all settled in."

Olivia pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and nodded. "Yeah. I'm good. Are the kids all asleep?"

Elliot nodded. "Lizzie never woke up and the other three practically fell right to sleep with their heads hit the pillow."

She smiled. "Good."

He rubbed the back of his neck and looked back at the door to his room, which was right across the hall. "Well…I'm pretty beat too so I think I'll head to bed. But if you need anything I'll just be right across the hall."

She looked over at his door and then back at him. "Okay…thanks."

He stared at her for a moment before whispering. "I'm really glad you're here…"

He gripped the doorframe tighter and smiled up at him. "I'm glad I'm here too El…"

He leaned forward and kissed her cheek gently before turning around and walking across the hall to his own room. Olivia shut the door behind her and then leaned up against it, trying to control the rapid beating of her heart.

It was going to be one long week…

* * *

The next morning, Olivia woke up feeling more well rested then she ever had. She rolled over in her large bed and looked out the window to see the sun shining over the clear blue lake. She smiled and stretched, feeling ready to face the day no matter what it held.

She slipped out of bed, threw on a bra and slipped her feet into some sandals before opening her door. She walked towards the bathroom that she and Elliot would be sharing and stopped dead when she saw Elliot standing in the doorway, with only a towel wrapped around his waist, dripping wet.

"Oh…h-h-hi…" She stuttered feeling extremely flustered by the situation.

He smirked at her and took another towel to rub the top of his head, which only made the muscles in his arms bulge more. "Morning Liv…"

She tried to look away but her eyes kept turning back to his bare chest and she knew her face was probably bright red. "G-good morning."

He leaned against the doorframe. "Did you sleep well?"

She wanted to scream at him because it was obvious he was milking the moment, to try and get her to admit she had feelings for him. "I did."

He inhaled deeply and looked out the window at the end of the hallway. "Me too. There's something about the crisp lake air that really soothes you. Washed all the stress of work away…"

She smiled awkwardly at him and rubbed her hands together. "Yeah…"

He stepped aside and smiled at her again. "Well I'll let you get in there…I promised my Aunt I'd help her make breakfast. See you in a bit." He said winking at her.

She blushed again and ducked into the bathroom, shutting the door quickly. Elliot chuckled to himself as he made his way towards his bedroom realizing he had her right where he wanted her.

* * *

After breakfast, everyone went to sit by the lake. Olivia was sitting on a towel and watching Elliot's kids jumping off the dock into the water as they laughed and screamed. She was wearing her bathing suit but had a pair of jean shorts and a white t-shirt on over it not sure if she wanted to risk taking her clothes off just yet. Olivia laughed as Dickie pushed Kathleen and Maureen off the dock and Elliot sat down beside her.

"That kid is a piece of work…" He said referring to his son.

Olivia looked over at him and laughed, she was extremely thankful that he still had his shirt on. "Like father like son."

He smirked at her. "Ha. Ha."

She smiled and looked back at the water. "So your Aunt said you came here a lot as a kid."

Elliot nodded and smiled at his kids. "Yeah. It was always my favorite part of the summer. Auntie Lu and Uncle John were like a second set of parents to me…and when things were rough with my parents they were always there for me."

She smiled and reached for her water bottle that was beside her. "It's nice that you had them. Your Aunt seems really sweet…"

Elliot knew that besides her mother, Olivia had no other family. Growing up she had never had anyone to lean on before which was part of the problem right now. She didn't know how to let people in, but he hoped he would be able to change that for her.

"She's the best…by the end of the week you'll be one of her surrogate kids too." He said nudging her.

Olivia smiled and looked back out at the dock. "We'll see…" They sat in silence enjoying the beautiful day for a few moments before Olivia spoke again. "You know I was pretty impressed by your waffle making skills. I had no idea you knew how to cook…"

He smirked and pulled his t-shirt over his head, enjoying the fact that her face was flushed with color again at the sight of his bare chest for the second time in one day. "There are a lot of things you don't know about me…"

She swallowed hard and put her sunglasses on to try and hide the fact that she was enjoying the view of his naked torso. "You'd think after being partners for seven years we'd know everything about each other…"

He shrugged. "I do know a lot about you…but you've also always been a bit of a mystery."

She looked back at him, surprised by his statement. "Really?

He nodded. "You only share as much as you want to share Olivia which usually isn't a lot…"

She bit her lip and looked back at the lake just as Dickie dived into the water. "I guess I just like to keep my personal life to myself…"

He nodded slowly. "I understand that. But it's okay to rely on other people sometimes you know…"

She chuckled as she shook her head. "That's only something you've learned very recently Elliot. You've never really been an open book yourself…"

He smirked. "Fair enough. But I'm willing to talk now…so what do you want to know?"

She was both confused and intrigued by what he was saying. But there were questions she wanted answered and she figured now that she had the chance to get her answers she better not mess it up.

"Fine. How do you really feel about your divorce?" She asked turning her body to stare him head on.

He was surprised that she had gone for such a hard-hitting question right off the bat but he wasn't about to back down. "It was hard. And I hate that it had to affect the kids the way it did but I know now that it was the right decision. Kathy and I weren't in love anymore and we couldn't pretend otherwise anymore. It wasn't healthy. Next question." He finished with s smirk.

She was impressed by the honesty in his answer. "Okay…what were you thinking when Gitano had the gun pressed to your head?" She asked in a tiny whisper.

Elliot let out a shaky breath and looked back at his kids and smiled sadly. "First I thought about my kids…about how they were going to grow up without a father. I worried that they wouldn't really know how much I loved them. And then I thought about all the chances I never took…the things I never said to them and to you…"

She squinted at him as she felt her heart begin to race faster in her chest. "To me?"

Elliot nodded and turned away from his kids to face her. "Yeah. I was afraid I was going to die without every getting the chance to tell you how much you really do mean to me."

She swallowed the lump that was growing in her throat and she looked down at her hands, which were shaking slightly. "Elliot I-"

"And I was afraid of what would happen to you if I died…" He whispered.

She took a deep breath as she sat up straight to try and show that she was strong. "I've taken care of myself pretty much my entire life Elliot. I would have been okay…"

He pouted to pretend she had hurt him. "So you wouldn't have missed me at all?"

She couldn't help but laugh as she shook her head. "Of course I would have missed you…"

He nodded and reached out to touch her leg gently. "What I meant was that I was worried that you would never realize that you deserve to be loved. I was worried that you would continue to pretend to be okay when deep down we both know that all you've ever wanted was somewhere to belong."

The lump in her throat was growing larger and her eyes were beginning to burn with tears. "Why did you say I was still a mystery to you? It seems you know me better than I even know myself…"

He smiled sadly at her. "Maybe…"

She lifted her sunglasses off of her face and rested them on top of her head. "I wish that I could give you what you want Elliot but I just don't think I can…"

"Why not?" He asked leaning into her a little. "Don't you think I could make you happy?"

She smiled sadly at him. "I know you could make me happy Elliot. You already do. But I don't think that I could make you happy…"

He sighed and shook his head; he turned his body back towards the lake. "That's insane."

She felt the spell of the moment break and her heart ached. "Maybe to you Elliot…but to me it's not. I've never had anyone in my life that I've had to depend on or consider when making my own decisions. I've just done things for myself…but if we were together then everything would change for me and I don't know if I would be able to deal with it. Not to mention how it would change us…"

"But wouldn't it change us for the better?" He asked turning back to her quickly. "I mean I'm not saying it would be easy…or that it would be perfect all the time but what are we supposed to do Olivia? Do we just go back to the way it was before and pretend that we don't have these feelings for each other?"

She saw the pleading in his eyes and heard it in his voice and she wished she had a better answer for him. "I don't know Elliot…I just don't know…"

He sighed and ran a hand over the top of his head. "I can't go back to that Olivia. I'll be here for you like I promised but I'll never pretend that my feelings for you are anything less then they are."

She watched him as he stared out at the lake, watching his children so as to avoid her gaze. She knew he loved her. She could feel it, and yet everything she had ever known or believed about her life was keeping her from him. She knew he deserved some sort of answer…

He looked so sad and it broke her heart. "When I was younger my Mom reminded me almost everyday what I was…where I came from. I've tried to hard to believe otherwise but no matter what I do I can't let that part of my past go."

Elliot turned back to her, he seemed surprised that she was beginning to open up to him and she knew she had to keep going before she lost the nerve. "Even now when I look in the mirror sometimes I wonder if I look like my father…if I'm anything like him."

Elliot stared at her for a moment before speaking. "There is not one evil bone in your body Olivia. You are the most selfless person I know…you couldn't be like him. You aren't like him."

She smiled and shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not. The truth is I'll never know because I don't know who he is or where he is…he could be dead for all I know. But he could also be alive…and he could have raped other women. What if I have brothers and sisters? What if there are other people out there like me?"

Elliot didn't know what to say in response to that. "Olivia-"

"I joined SVU because I thought if I could help other victims it would make me feel less guilty about what my Mom went through. But it hasn't helped…" She whispered sadly.

"Do you regret deciding to work there?" He asked curiously.

She smiled and shook her head. "It's not always easy. And sometimes seeing the victims makes me feel worse about what happened to my Mom. But for the most part it makes me feel good because I get to help people start a new life. I just wish I could do the same thing for myself…"

"Maybe you can…" He said with a hopeful smile.

"The point is…I've never seen myself as a someone who deserves happiness because I brought so much pain to my Mom." Olivia said hoping that he would understand. "And we both know it isn't easy to change the way we think overnight…"

He inhaled quickly and turned back to the water. "I suppose you're right…"

She turned back to watch Elliot's kids again afraid to meet his eyes. "So now what?"

He didn't turn to look at her when he spoke but she knew he was being sincere. "Now we try and figure out how to make you realize that you do deserve to be loved."

She couldn't help but smile as she looked at him out of the corner of her eye. "You're not giving up on me?"

His face broke out in that favorite smile of hers and she knew he meant what he said next. "Never."

She opened her mouth to say something back to him but was interrupted by a stream of cold water hitting her in the back of the head. She jumped as the water continued to spray at her and noticed that Elliot was getting wet too. He spun around and glared at his son who was spraying one of his water guns at them.

"Dickie!" Elliot yelled, he tried to sound angry but he couldn't hold back the laughter in his voice.

Dickie started to run when his father ran after him and Olivia got up and watched Elliot chase his son. She was laughing as Elliot scooped the young boy up, swung him around and took the water gun from him as he began to soak his son in return. Dickie was laughing as he ran towards Olivia and went to hide behind her to protect himself.

"You won't spray me when Olivia's in the way!" Dickie yelled triumphantly as his sisters watched from the dock.

"Are you sure about that? He asked pulling back the handle that would release the stream of water.

Olivia raised an eyebrow at him. "You better not…"

Dickie peeked his head around the side of Olivia with a nervous glance. "Uh oh…I know that look."

Elliot was smirking and Olivia recognized it too. "Elliot Stabler…don't you da-"

She screeched as the cold water hit her square in the face. Elliot's girls all gasped, surprised that he had dared attack Olivia like that but when they saw her wipe the water from her face, they knew she would get her revenge.

Olivia ran at Elliot before he could even have time to react, she pulled the water gun from his hands and started to squirt him back. Dickie yelled in excitement and went to go fill up another water gun to join in on the fun.

He didn't have time to catch up with them though because Elliot had run towards the dock where his girls squealed and jumped in the water to avoid the chase. Elliot stopped at the very edge of the dock and threw his hand sup in defeat.

"I surrender!" He said laughing as his face dripped with water.

Olivia smiled triumphantly and lowered her weapon. "You've seen me handle a gun before Elliot…you should have known I'd win."

He sighed and took a small step towards her. "You're right…I should have known better."

Olivia smiled and looked at his three daughters who were wading in the water. "See girls…your Dad isn't as tough as he'd like you to believe."

"Yeah Dad! You were beat by a girl!" Lizzie yelled laughing at her father.

Dickie was at the top of the dock now watching anxiously, waiting for the right moment to strike again as Elliot stepped closer to Olivia. She was laughing along with the girls and didn't seem to notice just how close he was too her. Elliot stared longingly at the way her wet white shirt clung to her toned body perfectly. He could see the blue bikini top underneath and remembered what she had looked like in his bed…naked and in his arms.

He smirked and shook the image out of his mind before he grabbed Olivia's arm, he lifted her up easily much to her dismay. He could hear her yelling at him to stop but he jumped in the lake with her in his arms while his kids watched in shock.

When Olivia broke the surface, she gasped for air and spun around when she heard Elliot laughing behind her. "You little-"

He glanced over at his kids. "Don't say anything that would be inappropriate in front of my kids Detective Benson…"

She smirked at him before lunging to put her hands on his head. He held his breath as she dunked him under the water and he pulled her down deep with him. They could hear Elliot's kids laughing and the sound of someone jumping in the water, probably Dickie.

When they came up for air again, Olivia was laughing along with Elliot now. "You're such a jerk…" She said laughing again as she splashed water in his face. "You surrendered!"

Elliot chuckled as his kids continue to splash around them. "All's fair in love and war…and this is a bit of both isn't it?"

She laughed and reached to the top of her head. "I lost my sunglasses because of you."

He shrugged. "I'll buy you a new pair…"

She just shook her head and continued to tread in the water, enjoying the way it cooled her off from the intense heat. She looked back at his kids who by now were on to their next game, clearly bored no that the battle between their Dad and her was over.

When she turned back to him, she was surprised by how intense his gaze was. "What are you looking at?"

"You look beautiful…" He whispered feeling caught up in the moment.

She felt her cheeks begin to blush again but she just laughed. "Did you hit your heat on a rock when you fell in the water Elliot?"

He smirked and moved closer to her as if he was going to kiss her. "I'm being serious…"

She swallowed hard and let herself sink a little more into the water so only her head was visible. "Elliot…"

"Don't ruin the moment…" He whispered as his hands grasped her hip underwater gently.

He heard her gasp but she didn't seem to push him away as he pulled her towards him easily in the water. He was about to lean in all the way to kiss her when a shadow flew over their heads and a large splash erupted in the water beside them.

"Dickie!" Elliot screamed as his son came up from under the water after he had jumped over them.

"What?" He asked with a knowing smirk on his face.

Elliot glanced back at Olivia but she was just smiling at his son and he knew now wasn't the time for the kiss he so desperately wanted. So he pulled away from her and swam towards his son as Olivia laughed behind him. Dickie swam as hard and fast as he could but Elliot picked him up easily and tossed his son up in the air and the girls swam up behind them to join.

The girls playfully splashed Olivia who wasn't afraid to splash back as Elliot scooped each one of his kids up one by one and tossed them into the water just like Dickie. As they continued to play and splash around in the water, Lucy and Bernie watched on from the window in the kitchen happily.

"Look at him…" Bernie said sighing happily. "He hasn't smiled like that since he was a teenager."

Lucy nodded in agreement and leaned against the counter. "He loves her…that much is clear."

Bernie looked over at her older and wiser sister. "How long do you think it will take them together?"

Lucy shrugged. "It's hard to say. I think if it were up to Elliot they would be together right now. But Olivia may be more standoffish…she seems to be very heavily guarded."

Bernie nodded and looked back out the window at her family and Olivia. "Elliot's told me a little about her past…she hasn't had the easiest life. I don't know if she will be able to let go of it all and let herself be happy."

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see…but I have a feeling that this week will give them the answers they are looking for." Lucy said turning away from the window as she walked to the fridge to figure out what to make for lunch.

Bernie laughed and turned back to watch her sister. "And what makes you so sure of that?"

"Because I've watched many people find what it is they are searching for here on the lake." Lucy said smirking at her sister.

Bernie was quiet for a moment. "You know I always wished that you would move back to New York…especially after John died. I hate that you are all alone here."

Lucy shook her head and took out some meat to make sandwiches for everyone. "I'm not alone Bernie. I have many friends up here, you know that. And besides this is my home. John built it for us…this is where I belong."

"But John is gone now…" Bernie whispered. "What's keeping you here?"

Lucy walked back towards the window with the food on a platter to prepare as she watched Elliot, Olivia and the kids again. "I love this house Bernie. And whenever my family visits I look at all the joy this place brings to them…and I know that I could never leave. And because…even though John may be physically gone he's still here in spirit."

Bernie stared at her sister and thought about how much her sister and brother-in-law had been in love. "I can feel him too…"

Lucy smiled and looked over at her sister. "Don't you worry about me Bernie. I am quite happy here…and I wouldn't worry about your son either." She looked back out the window and laughed as Olivia pushed Elliot into the water after they had crawled up on the dock again. "He looks happy enough to me…"

Bernie sighed and followed her sister's gaze out the window. "He really does…"

"Like I said…" Bernie said as she took out a knife to spread the mustard on the sandwiches. "The lake has a way of helping people find what it is they are searching for…"

Bernie recognized that tone in her sister's voice. It was the way she sounded when she was determined to make something happened. And Bernie realized that even if Elliot and Olivia couldn't figure out a way to make it work, Lucy would find a way to make them get their acts together once and for all…

* * *

**What did you think? I hope you liked it! I'll try and update soon! :) **


	5. Chapter 4

**Once again thanks for all the feedback and support :) I hope you like the chapter! I'll update soon! **

* * *

Two days later, Olivia woke up and walked out into the kitchen expecting to find the normal chaos of the kitchen. Instead she found Lucy and Bernie sitting at the table alone eating breakfast and drinking coffee.

"Good morning Olivia!" Bernie said smiling at Olivia as she walked towards them. "Would you like some coffee?"

Olivia smiled and sat down at the table beside Lucy. "Good morning. That would be wonderful. Thank you!"

Bernie got up to make Olivia some coffee as she spoke. "Elliot took the kids out for breakfast so they could spend some time together alone. He didn't want to wake you up because he figured you never get to sleep in."

Bernie put the coffee in front of Olivia and she smiled at her. "Thanks Bernie. That's good that they got some time alone. I know he misses them a lot now that he doesn't live with them all the time."

Lucy nodded. "It's been an adjustment for all of them. But they seem okay with the divorce now."

Olivia took a sip of her coffee and nodded. "It can't be easy at their age…but it will be better in the long run for everyone."

Bernie sat back down and sighed happily. "You know I've been meaning to thank you for being so supportive of Elliot through all of this. I know he isn't always the easiest man to deal with…he gets that from his father." She said smirking. "But he truly does have a good soul."

Olivia smiled at Elliot's mother. "He can be a pain in the ass…but so can I. I think that's why we work so well together…we aren't afraid to say it like it is when we need too."

Lucy laughed and took another sip of her coffee. "That's exactly what Elliot needs sometimes. Someone to just call him out on his bull shit from time to time. You keep him in check!"

Olivia laughed and put her hands back on the table. "I suppose we could all use that sometimes."

"Well however you've done it…you've really helped him through these past few years and I truly appreciate that." Bernie said reaching a hand out to her.

Olivia smiled and thought about her relationship with Elliot. "Elliot's a great guy…and I can tell it has a lot to do with the way he was raised by both you and Lucy. He has his moments…but deep down he's one of the most amazing people I've ever know."

Lucy and Bernie looked at each other; they recognized the sincerity and emotion in Olivia's voice. Their suspicions were confirmed in that moment, they knew that there was definitely something between Elliot and Olivia.

"I can see why Kathy was jealous of you for all of those years…" Bernie said shaking her head as she laughed.

Olivia's face blushed. "Kathy had nothing to worry about…"

Lucy raised an eyebrow. "Elliot is a family man and he wouldn't have done anything to betray that marriage…but he cares deeply for you."

Olivia felt her heart pounding in her chest as she put her elbow on the table and rested her chin in her hand. "He's a good friend…"

"Just a friend?" Bernie asked leaning in towards her.

Olivia looked over at her, feeling nervous about where this conversation was headed. "Um…well I mean he's my partner at work. So I guess it's not a normal friendship. Something more than that…"

Lucy licked her lips and stood up. "I would say it is definitely more than just a friendship…but Bernie let's not ambush the poor girl."

"I'm not ambushing her." Bernie said to her sister. "I'm merely getting to know her better. She is a big part of my son's life after all…I have the right to ask questions that effect him."

"True. But there is a difference between asking questions and butting into other people's business." Lucy said turning back to her little sister.

Bernie huffed and turned to Olivia. "Am I making you uncomfortable dear?"

Olivia sat up straighter, trying to figure out how to answer the question, "Well I-"

"Of course she isn't going to admit that you are making her uncomfortable Bernie!" Lucy said sighing as she walked back to the table. "She doesn't want to offend you!"

"That's absurd." Bernie said rolling her eyes. "You don't know what you are talking about Lucy. You can tell me if I'm making you uncomfortable Olivia…"

"No…no you aren't making me uncomfortable really." Olivia said feeling her cheeks beginning to blush. "It's just kind of a complicated topic…my relationship with Elliot is more than a friendship but I don't know how exactly to characterize it."

"Well are you in love with him?" Bernie asked bluntly.

"Bernie!" Lucy gasped. "You can't ask her something like that!"

Olivia rubbed the back of her neck as Bernie shrugged. "What? It's a yes or no answer isn't it?"

She was trying to figure out how to answer the question when the side door opened and the four kids and Elliot interrupted them. Olivia was extremely thankful for the interruption and smiled as the kids walked up to her.

"Good morning Olivia!" Dickie shouted as he jumped up beside her at the table.

Olivia smiled and ruffled his hair. "Morning buddy…" She stood up and cleared her throat, anxious to get away from Lucy and Bernie.

Elliot smiled at her as he took off his coat. "Hey. I hope you don't mind that we went out without you. I thought you might like to sleep in."

She shook her head and started to walk out of the kitchen. "Oh no. I don't mind at all."

"Where are you going?" He asked her curiously.

She threw her hair up in a messy bun and smiled. "I think I'm going to go for a run on that trail you showed me yesterday."

He smirked at her thinking maybe it would be an excuse to get some alone time with her. "Want me to go with you? You might get lost…"

She shook her head and smiled. "No. That's okay…Id rather run alone. Besides you should spend some more time with the kids."

Elliot glanced over at his mother and Aunt who were mysteriously trying to avoid his gaze. "Okay…see you later then?"

She nodded and started to walk back to her bedroom again. "Yeah. See you later."

When she left the room, Elliot's kids gathered around the table to play cards and he walked over to his Mom and Aunt by the fridge. "What happened?"

Bernie feigned innocence. "I don't know what you are talking about. She's just going for a run. What's the big deal?"

He cleared his throat and leaned against the counter. "I know her pretty well Ma…I can tell something's bothering her and she was fine last night so what happened?"

"Nothing." Bernie said shaking her head as she turned away from him.

Elliot turned to his Aunt. "Auntie Lu?"

Lucy clicked her tongue, which she did when she was irritated. "Your mother may have asked a few invasive questions about your relationship with Olivia…"

"Invasive questions?" Elliot asked feeling slightly annoyed. "What exactly does that mean?"

"Bernie…" Lucy said glaring at her sister.

Bernie sighed and turned to look at her son. "I simply asked her if she loved you or not…"

Elliot felt his heart drop into his stomach and he groaned. "Mom!"

Bernie shrugged her shoulders and tried to smile innocently. "What?"

He sighed and watched Olivia walk out of her room and towards the front door to leave. "Mom come on…really?"

The front door closed and Bernie sighed. "Elliot I just want to see you happy and it's obvious that there is a connection between the two of you. I was just curious…"

"I appreciate that you want me to be happy Mom and I am happy…but my relationship with Olivia is complicated to say the least. I think it's obvious how I feel about her and I would love nothing more than to be in a relationship with her but I don't want to push her." He said trying to make her understand.

"I tried to warn her…" Lucy said crossing her arms over her chest.

"Hey! You continued to the conversation too! You were the one that said Elliot cares deeply for her." Bernie said glaring at her older sister.

"Yes but I didn't overstep any boundaries." Lucy said smirking at her.

Elliot looked between them in disbelief. "You're acting like my kids…"

Lucy smiled and turned back to her nephew. "I'm sorry if we upset her Elliot. It wasn't our intention…I guess we're just curious. And you know as we age we tend to lose our filters."

Elliot rolled his eyes. "Yeah well the two of you never had much a filter to begin with…"

"Fair enough." Lucy said shrugging her shoulders. "But I wouldn't worry about Olivia. She'll be fine. Let her go for her run and she'll probably be fine when she gets back."

Elliot wasn't sure about that. Olivia could be sensitive about things, and given the state of their relationship at the moment he wasn't sure how she was going to react to the situation.

He sighed and rubbed the back of his tense neck. "Yeah…I guess."

Bernie smiled and slapped his back gently. "Who knows…maybe it will get her to admit how she truly feels. You could be thanking me later…"

Elliot stared at his mother apprehensively. "Don't get ahead of yourself Ma…"

Bernie smiled mischievously and walked over to the table to join the kids in their card game. Lucy stepped closer to her nephew and put a gentle hand on his arm.

"You're Mom's just worried about you…she didn't mean any harm." She said trying to defend her sister.

Elliot smiled at his Aunt. "I know…"

Lucy leaned up and kissed his cheek. "Don't worry too much about it. You get cranky when you worry…

She started to walk away and Elliot couldn't help but agree…he definitely got cranky when he worried.

* * *

On the trail Olivia was running along the trail trying to focus on her breathing as she went. All she could hear was the thump of her feet on the hard ground and the birds in the trees around her as she ran through the woods around the lake. It felt good to be outside on her own and away from all the questions and accusations. She knew Elliot's Mom and Aunt meant well but she had never dealt with confrontation of any kind very well.

Deep down she knew the answer to Bernie's question was that yes she was in love with him. She just to afraid to admit it. If she did admit her true feelings, everything about her life would change. Yes it could be a good change but she was too afraid to lose Elliot in her life completely if something went wrong. And in her relationships, things usually did go wrong.

When she reached the end of the trail, she came to a cliff that overlooked the lake. Elliot had taken her and the kids out here the day before and he told her he used to jump off of it has a kid.

Her heart was pounding in her chest as she sat down at the edge of the cliff and tried to catch her breath. She closed her eyes for a moment and lay back on the ground thinking about the night she had spent the night at Elliot's apartment.

No man had ever made her feel so alive, so beautiful and so loved and at the moment it had almost scared her. It wasn't just sex like she had assumed it would be...it was more than that. She finally understood what it was to make love to someone. Her heart was still racing as she was thinking about that night, and she knew that it had less to do with her run and more to do with remembering what it felt like to be touched by Elliot.

When Elliot had pushed her in the water and had tried to kiss her, she had to admit that part of her wanted it to happen. Yet at the same time, when she felt the splash form Dickie's jump in the water she felt somewhat relieved. It took all the pressure off…

She was so exhausted from all the emotions she was feeling she began to doze off and lost track of time…

* * *

When Olivia wasn't back forty-five minutes later Elliot was extremely anxious. She was a fast runner and he knew it wouldn't take her that long. Either she had gotten lost on the trail or she was so freaked out she didn't want to come back.

He asked his Mom and Aunt to keep an eye on the kids as he took to the trail to look for Olivia. His mind was racing with all the possibilities; he knew it had to do with his job. He always thought the worst about situations…

But truth be told what he was most worried about was that she was going to run from the possibility of them being a couple ever. When he reached the end of the trail, he was relieved to see her stretching by the cliff.

"I thought you got lost…" He said walking up behind her.

She turned and couldn't help but smile when she saw him. "Sorry. I closed my eyes for a second when I got here and I fell asleep."

He smirked and sat down beside her on the ground. "You feel asleep?"

She nudged him playfully. "You know as well as anyone that I hardly ever sleep when we are working. I guess my body is trying to catch up with the amount of sleep I should be getting."

He nodded and pulled his legs up to rest his elbows on his knees. "Fair enough."

Olivia curled her legs up in front of her and took a deep breath. "How was breakfast with the kids this morning?"

"It was good. I like spending time with them." He said looking out at the horizon.

"Good." She said as she licked her lips, hoping to avoid the conversation she knew he had come to have.

"You know I won't be angry if you tell my Mom to keep her mouth shut." He said turning to smirk at her.

She laughed and shook her head. "Yeah okay…"

"I'm sorry about all the questions they bombarded you with." He said sincerely. "They can be quite nosy when it comes to people's personal lives. They've been doing it to me since I was a kid…"

She smiled at him. "They mean well…they just want to see you happy."

He took a deep breath and shrugged. "I guess. They just need to learn when to not overstep their boundaries."

Olivia bit her lip and touched the rocks at her sides. "So you know exactly what she asked then?"

Elliot nodded slowly. "They asked a lot of things…but my Mom asked you if you were in love with me…"

She took her hair out of the elastic and let it fall around her shoulders. "Mhm…"

He cleared his throat and tried to sound casual as he spoke again, "They didn't say if you answered or not though…"

"I see where you learned your interrogation skills now…" She teased him.

Elliot laughed and smiled innocently at her. "Can't blame me for being curious as to what your answer to that question would be."

She looked at him and wanted desperately to be able to say those three words to him but she couldn't. "El…you know I am…"

"I know you are what?" He asked wanting nothing more than to hear her say it out loud.

She sighed and looked back out at the lake. "Elliot I've never said that to anyone before…and no one's ever said it back to me. It's not that easy…I can't just say it. There are too many complications…to many things that it could change."

"I get that…and it kills me to know no one's ever said it to you but Liv…" He whispered urging her to look at him, and when she did he said honestly. "I'm in love with you. I have been for a long time…"

The words were on the tip of her tongue, but she just couldn't bring herself to say them. "Elliot…I just can't…"

He inhaled sharply and nodded, trying to be supportive. "Alright. I understand."

"It kills me that I'm hurting you Elliot…and I'm trying so hard to figure this all out but it's so complicated." She whispered desperately wanting him to understand.

Elliot stared at her face for a moment, trying to memorize every part of her face. "I know…"

She blushed at the way he was staring at her and she wanted to kiss him, but she didn't want to give him the wrong idea. "Do you? The last thing I would ever want to do would be to cause you pain Elliot…"

"I think you demonstrated that when you refused to take that shot in the warehouse…" He whispered referring to the Gitano case.

Olivia shivered just thinking about it. "I could never be the cause of your death Elliot. I would have never forgiven myself…"

Elliot nodded understanding what she meant. "When I saw you lying there with blood on your neck…I thought I was going to die right then and there. I felt sick to my stomach…"

She bit her lip nervously and squinted her eyes in the sun. "What's going to happen when we go back to work? We're supposed to put the victims first but I don't think we can do that if it means one of us getting hurt."

Elliot nodded slowly. "I know that if it came down to it…I'd pick saving you over any victim or perp."

She looked back at him and whispered nervously. "So does that mean we can't be partners anymore?"

He took a deep breath and looked back at her, feeling sad just thinking about the idea of not working with her. "I don't know…"

She smiled sadly. "I don't know how I would work with someone else after all these years…"

He nodded agreeing with her. "It would definitely be strange…"

"Although…" She felt nervous about what she was going to say, but she knew deep down it was something she had to face. "Lately I've been wondering if SVU is where I should be right now anyway."

His heart hurt just thinking about it but he knew that if it helped her, it could be a good thing. "Where would you go?"

Olivia smiled sadly. "I don't…maybe computer crimes? I've always been interested in that stuff."

Elliot nodded. "I could see you doing that. But…you work so well with the victims. You connect with them better than anyone else I know…not to mention how you can crack the perps."

"Well I learned from the best…" She said turning to him. "You taught me pretty much everything I know about the job El…you don't know how much I appreciate that."

Elliot shook his head. "Please…I may have given you a few pointers over the years but you were born to help people Olivia. I've known that since the first day we started working together."

She smirked. "Yeah well…it's easier to fix other people's problems then fix my own."

Elliot chuckled. "That's true…"

She looked back at the water. "I don't know…maybe I could go back to school and become a counselor. I'd still be able to work with victims…but I'd just be helping them rebuild their lives. Maybe that's what I'm supposed to do…"

"You could give Huang a run for his money as our shrink…" He said honestly.

She rolled her eyes. "Well I don't know about that…but it's something to think about."

He didn't like t he idea of her not working beside him everyday but he could see her being a counselor and he knew it might make her happier. "I can see you doing that…and I think…no I know that you'd be amazing at it."

She smiled back at him. "Thanks El…"

He smiled before standing up. "We should get back before they send out a search party for us."

He reached a hand out to help her pull up, when's he stood in front of him she smiled. "Not today…but before we go home can we jump off this cliff?"

Elliot looked down at the water. "Sure. If that's what you want."

She smiled and leaned up to kiss his cheek gently before pulling back and starting to walk away from him. "Race you back to the house Stabler!"

Elliot watched her run for a moment, caught up in the fact that she had kissed his cheek and the way she looked in those shorts she was wearing. But when he finally snapped out of it he took off running, determined to catch up to her. He knew in that moment, no matter what her choice was at the end of all this, she would always be in his life. He could never walk away from her…

* * *

That night after dinner; Elliot was roasting marshmallows with the kids by the fire pit in the backyard. Olivia was helping Bernie and Lucy clean the dishes from dinner as Lucy gave her sister a quick nudge towards Olivia before walking out to join the kids and Elliot.

Bernie glared at her sister before turning back to Olivia who was washing the dishes in the sink. "Olivia…I…I hope you weren't upset about all my questions this morning. I wasn't trying to pry…I was honestly just curious. I tend to get ahead of myself sometimes and I don't always realize how my words can affect people."

Olivia smiled and reached for a towel to dry her hands. "Bernie it's okay…I get it. And I wish I could give you an answer…but right now I'm not ready."

Bernie smiled and reached out to hold her hand gently. "I understand. And you don't owe me any answers Olivia…I know that your relationship with him is more than just a friendship. I think about how you've helped him all these years…how you've had his back and it just makes me so grateful for you. I guess I just went a little overboard…"

Olivia swallowed hard and looked out the window at Elliot and his kids. "We're partners at work…and we need to be close. But our relationship is something I never expected to have in my life. I've never had anyone in my life that I could count on 100% and I am so grateful for him…and yet it terrifies me at the same time."

Bernie nodded. "I understand…"

"You've got a great son Bernie…" She whispered to her.

Bernie sighed and looked out the window and smiled at her son. "Yes. I do. I don't know how much credit I can take for how he turned out…but he is pretty great."

Olivia knew that her relationship with her son wasn't always great. "Bernie…"

"I made a lot of mistakes with him…" Bernie said as she began to tear up. "But no matter how many times I always screwed up…he always did whatever I asked of him. I suppose a lot of it was to make sure he got my approval…to have me tell him I loved him as much as I should have. But he was such a good boy…always so strong and determined to make everyone happy."

"He's still like that…" Olivia said smiling as she thought about him. "He'd do anything for those kids…for his friends. No matter what it means for him…"

Bernie nodded in agreement. "He'd do anything for you too you know. Anything at all."

Olivia nodded and turned back to Bernie. "I know…"

She sighed and walked towards the counter to pick up another dirty dish. "I know that my son loved Kathy. And part of him always will because of the kids they have together. But I don't believe that he was in love with her…not truly."

"Really?" Olivia asked curiously, she couldn't deny the fact that she always been jealous of Kathy.

Bernie turned back to her and nodded. "Yes. I don't necessarily think they would have ended up together if she hadn't gotten pregnant. I'm glad they got married because I got four beautiful grandchildren out of it…but I want my son to be happy. And he wasn't completely happy…not with Kathy. Not happy the way he is when he's around you…"

Olivia swallowed the lump in her throat and stared at the woman in front of her. "He makes me happy too Bernie…so incredibly happy."

Bernie placed the dish in the sink and then walked all the way over to Olivia, she took her hand in hers and smiled. "I know I don't know everything about your past Olivia…but I can tell there is something holding you back. And I'm not asking you to tell me what it is…and maybe you don't even know what it is…but I know my son. I know him better than most people and I know that he loves you with every ounce of his being…there is no doubt in that. Don't be afraid to love him…"

Olivia bit her lip and felt her eyes well up with tears. "I do want to love him…I truly do. But I don't know how…I don't want to hurt him but I'm afraid that either way I'm going to end up hurting him somehow. It's what I do…and I don't mean it. It just happens."

Bernie nodded. "I understand that…but I also know that my biggest regrets in life are not taking chances because of fear. There are so many things I wish I had done and wonder about how my life would have turned out if I had taken them. I don't want that for you…"

"I don't want that for myself either…" She whispered.

"I can't tell you what to do Olivia…but I can give you some advice if you'd let me." Bernie said hopefully.

Olivia smiled and wiped a tear away from her face. "I'd love some advice."

Bernie squeezed her hand and smiled at her. "As much as I want you two to be together…you also can't make any rash decisions. I think you should take a long hard look at your life and how he fits into it. You need to think about whether or not you can afford to lose him…"

Olivia tensed up. "I don't want to lose him…"

Bernie smiled at her. "And I don't think that he will ever fully take you out of his life. But…either way your relationship is going to change somehow. If you are together, your relationship will grow and mature for the better. But if you try and go back to the way things were…you'll both eventually have to face the idea of being with someone else. Could you handle seeing him with another woman?"

Olivia's heart dropped quickly. "No. I hated seeing him with Kathy to be honest…and now I think it would be even harder to see him with someone else."

"Then I think you need to decide how you want to have him in your life. You need to decide if you want him as a partner…or just someone who is in your life but loves someone else. He says he'll wait forever…and I don't think he could ever love someone the way he loves you…but he shouldn't be alone forever. He wouldn't be happy…" Bernie whispered.

Olivia nodded. "You're right. And I want him to be happy…but not with someone else. And it isn't fair to ask him to wait forever…"

"Don't decide overnight…take your time but remember that life is short. You don't know what is going to happen…you don't want to wake up one morning and realize you never told him how you felt." Bernie whispered.

Olivia thought back to the Gitano case and thought about what Elliot had said the other day. He had been afraid he was going to die and never be able to tell her how he really felt about her. And she realized…if he had died she would never have been able to accept the fact that he didn't know how much he meant to her either.

She smiled and leaned forward to hug Bernie. "Thank you Bernie…"

Bernie hugged her tightly and smiled. "I didn't overstep any boundaries this time?"

Olivia laughed and pulled away form her, shaking her head. "No. You said everything I needed to hear. Thank you."

Bernie squeezed her hand and smiled. "Good. Why don't we do these dishes later and go join the fun outside?"

Olivia smiled and nodded in agreement; she grabbed a sweater and followed Bernie out to the backyard. She smiled and sat down next to Elliot on the bench he was sitting on.

She pulled the marshmallow off the stick he was using. "Thanks."

He pretended to glare at her. "Hey…I spent a long time making sure that one was toasted perfectly."

She licked her finger and smiled at him. "And it was perfect. Thanks."

He chuckled and looked over at his Mom who was now busily talking to Maureen and Kathleen about something. "You were in there for awhile with my Mom. I hope she didn't upset you again…"

Olivia reached down into the bag at his feet and took out another marshmallow and put it on the stick he was holding. "No she didn't upset me. We actually had a nice chat."

"About what?" He asked curiously.

She smirked at him. "Nothing you need to worry about…"

"That means you were talking about me." He said laughing as he moved the stick closer to the fire.

She chuckled and shrugged. "Maybe…"

He knew better then to press her any further on the topic so he figured he'd change the subject. "About what we were talking about earlier…you know you changing jobs…"

She grabbed a nearby stick and started to roast her own marshmallow. "What about it?"

"Whatever you decide…" He said honestly as he looked over at her. "I just want you to know that I support you completely. It will be weird to not have you at the precinct but if it is something that makes you happy…then I'm happy."

For a moment, she got lost up in how handsome he was as the fire lit up his face. She knew Bernie was right…she had to start making some serious decisions about her future. She couldn't possibly see her life without him in it…

"That means more to me then you could possibly know El…thank you." She said resting her hand on his knee gently.

He put his hand over hers and smiled. "Don't mention it…"

They stared at each other for a few more minutes before the sound of laughter pulled them out of the moment. As they sat together at the fire, Olivia realized that for the first time in her life she felt like she was a part of a real family. And it was the best feeling in the world…

* * *

**What did you think? I hope it was worth the two day wait! I'll probably have the next update up by Thursday or Friday. Maybe tomorrow depending on how much I get done tomorrow...anyway...hope you enjoyed! :) **


	6. Chapter 5

**Hello lovely readers! Hope you like the new chapter :) I'm going to try my best to write the next chapter tonight/tomorrow morning because I have people coming to visit for the Long weekend and won't have time to write again until Tuesday. So the more you review, the more motivation I will have to write tonight! Thanks for your support! **

* * *

The next day, Olivia woke up feeling happy for the first time in a long time. There were still things she needed to work on, but she wasn't as nervous about the future as she had been before. When she got out of bed, she stretched and opened the window to let in the cool breeze and she smiled feeling ready to face the day.

She walked out to the kitchen and saw Elliot helping his Mom plate some eggs and bacon for everyone. Lizzie ran up to Olivia and she scooped her up in her arms, kissing her cheek.

"Hey sweetie. How did you sleep?" She said walking over to the table letting her sit on her lap.

"I was sleeping good until Dickie jumped on my bed to scare me!" Lizzie said pouting at her twin brother.

Olivia chuckled and looked over at Elliot's son. "Why'd you do that buddy?"

"Because I couldn't sleep so I was bored…" Dickie said shrugging as he stuffed his mouth with scrambled eggs.

Olivia smiled at him as Lizzie climbed down from her lap and took a plate from her Dad. "Well you scared me! And I didn't like it."

Elliot handed Olivia a plate and smiled at her before looking at his son. "Don't worry Lizzie, Dickie and I talked about it and he won't be doing that again. If he does he's sleeping in the backyard for the rest of the week."

Lizzie smirked at her brother. "He would be to scared to do that."

Dickie glared at her. "No I wouldn't! I'm not scared of anything!"

Elliot sat down beside Olivia and smiled at his son. "Okay. If that's the case you can sleep out there tonight then."

Dickie swallowed the food in his mouth as his family all looked at him. "Alone?"

Elliot poured himself a glass of orange juice and nodded. "Yeah. I mean you said you weren't afraid of anything so you should be fine right?"

Dickie sat up straighter and nodded slowly. "Of course I'll be fine."

"Good." He said taking a sip of his juice. "But until later…we are going out in Mr. Nichols boat from next door. He said he'd take us out and you guys can go tubing and everything."

"Yes!" Kathleen yelled jumping up and down. "Mr. Nichols son is so cute! Is he coming too?"

Elliot's face turned ghost white. "Wait…how old are his sons?"

Lucy chuckled. "Tim is the same age as Maureen and Ethan is a year older than Kathleen."

"Come on Kathleen…let's go pick out what bathing suits we are going to wear." Maureen said ignoring her breakfast and running towards her room.

"I call the pink one!" Kathleen yelled running after her sister.

"You will both be wearing t-shirts and shorts over those bathing suits!" Elliot yelled after them angrily.

Olivia giggled and looked over at him. "You can't keep them away from boys forever Elliot…"

He raised an eyebrow. "Why not? I can lock them in the basement if I have too until they are at least fifty years old."

Olivia smirked. "Considering we arrest people for locking up their kids like that…I'd say that wasn't such a good idea."

He pouted and pushed his food away. "Fine. But I don't like it."

Olivia, Lucy and Bernie all just laughed at Elliot's discomfort as the twins continued to eat their breakfast unaware of what was going on. Olivia couldn't help but smile as she heard the girls squealing excitedly in their room about going out on the boat with the boys. She glanced at Elliot and thought he looked so adorable when he worried like that about his kids.

But then again…she always thought he was adorable.

* * *

When everyone was ready, they met out in the backyard to meet Mr. Nichols out on the dock. The kids were all talking and joking, feeling excited about the day ahead of them. Olivia walked up behind Elliot and smiled at him as he stood anxiously waiting for Mr. Nichols to see what his sons looked like.

"You okay?" She asked placing a gentle hand on his arm.

He relaxed when he felt her touch and he smiled. "I'm fine. Just hate that my kids are growing up."

She laughed and slipped a new pair of sunglasses on her head. "You'll be fine. And by the way…these are my only other pair of sunglasses so don't make me lose them like the other ones okay?"

He smirked at her and then finally looked at her outfit. "Okay…" His voice caught in his throat a little and he saw her smirk back.

She was wearing a black bikini and a purple bathing suit cover that was strapless and fell down to her thighs showing off her perfectly toned legs. "You sure you're okay Stabler?"

Elliot licked his lips and tried to clear his throat. "Fine…I'm fine…"

She smiled and touched his cheek, making him close his mouth, which was currently hanging, open. "Keep telling yourself that…"

He watched her walk around him to greet the kids and he shook his head, trying to keep his mind from wandering once again. But she was making it difficult to be as respectful as he needed to be.

Martin Nicholas pulled his speedboat up in front of their dock and smiled. "Hey Elliot! You guys ready?"

Elliot glanced at his daughters who were huddled together waving at Martin's sons who were sitting at the back of the boat. "Yeah. Let's go!"

They all piled onto the boat and Elliot and Olivia put life jackets on Dickie and Lizzie as they took off towards the middle of the lake. Olivia sat down at the bench in the back and pulled Lizzie onto her lap playing around with her. Elliot was standing up at the wheel with Martin eying his girls nervously as they talked with Ethan and Tim at the front of the boat. Dickie stood by his Dads side trying to get a chance to steer the boat.

Olivia was bouncing Lizzie up and down making her laugh. "Olivia!"

She smiled and kissed her cheek. "I'll stop."

Lizzie turned in Olivia's lap and put her arms around Olivia's neck and smiled at her. "I'm really glad you came with us Olivia."

Olivia smiled and looked over at Elliot who was laughing and talking now with Martin. "I'm glad I came with you guys too Lizzie. I'm having a great time."

Lizzie stared at her for a moment and whispered. "Are you going to marry my Daddy?"

Olivia was surprised by the question but tried to answer her honestly. "Lizzie I care about your Dad very much…"

Lizzie nodded her head. "I know. And I know that he cares a lot about you too. I used to be sad that Mom and Dad aren't together anymore…but I think it's okay now. Mom seems happy with Andrew and I like him, he's really funny."

Olivia smiled and brushed some hair out of the young girls face. "I know it's been hard for you guys…but your parents love you very much. You know that right?"

Lizzie smiled and nodded. "I know. It's better because Daddy seems happier now…which makes the rest of us happy too."

"Well good…" Olivia said leaning forward to kiss her cheek.

"But Daddy is especially happy when he's with you." Lizzie said smirking at her.

Olivia laughed. "I never noticed how much you are like your Grandmother until now…"

Lizzie shrugged. "It's true. He smiles a lot when you are around."

Olivia felt her cheeks blush and she noticed that Elliot was watching her with his daughter and smiling. "Your Dad makes me happy too Lizzie…we are very close. I'd do anything for him just like I'd do anything for you and your brother and sisters too okay?"

Lizzie nodded and hopped down from Olivia's lap. "Okay. Love you Livvie." She said hugging her tightly.

Olivia hugged her back. "Love you too Lizzie."

Lizzie ran over to Dickie as Martin stopped the boat towards the middle of the lake. Elliot helped him take out the tubs and hook them up in the back as Dickie and Lizzie jumped up and down excitedly. Kathleen and Maureen seemed more interested in the boys then having anything to do with tubing.

"Dad! Dad can I go first?" Dickie asked pulling at his Dad's arm.

Elliot smiled at his son and picked him up. "Why don't we go together bud? You're still a little young to go by yourself."

Dickie was to excited to care so he agreed. Olivia took out her camera and sat with Lizzie as Martin started the boat and took off again as Dickie and Elliot clung to the tub. Lizzie was laughing hysterically as she watched her Dad and brother bounce up and down on the waves and Olivia was snapping pictures of the scene.

When they hit a large wave, the tub went up in the air and both Elliot and Dickie flew off into the water. Dickie was laughing as his Dad swam up beside him and pulled his son to his side by the straps on his life vest.

"Did you have fun?" Elliot asked laughing when he saw the huge smile on his sons face.

"I want to do it again!" Dickie yelled.

Elliot laughed and started to swim towards the boat, pulling Dickie along with him. "Let's give someone else a turn first."

When they got to the edge of the boat, Olivia helped pull Dickie up and Elliot climbed on board. "Whose next?" Martin called out.

"You want to go?" Kathleen asked her sister as she pulled off her t-shirt.

"Yeah let's do it!" Maureen said as they walked towards the back of the boat.

Elliot was handing Dickie a towel when he overheard the boys whisper. "They sure grew up…super hot." Tim said to his brother.

"Thank God for bikinis…" Ethan said with a smirk.

"Just wait till they get in the water and they get wet…even better." Tim said nudging Ethan whose smile grew wider.

Elliot felt his blood boil but he held back from saying anything so he didn't embarrass his girls. Martin started to move the boat again as the girls held onto the tub tightly, they were laughing and it almost made Elliot forget about the boys remarks. He walked towards Olivia and smiled as she took pictures of his girls.

"Daddy I want to go but I'm scared…" Lizzie said pulling at her Dad's legs.

Olivia looked at Elliot and smiled. "I'll go with you if you want Lizzie."

Lizzie's face lit up and she looked up at her Dad. "Is that okay?"

Elliot nodded. "Sure sweetie. You can go after your sisters."

Lizzie wrapped her arms around Olivia's waist and smiled out at her sisters. Elliot fell even more in love with Olivia at that moment watching her interact with his kids. They were so important to him and he needed someone that respected his relationship with them. She not only respected his relationship with them, but she loved them just as much as he did.

The girls impressed everyone by hanging on for quite a long time. But eventually they flipped off the raft as well laughing and screaming as they went through the air. When they were back on the boat, Olivia helped Lizzie onto the tube and Elliot helped calm her nerves.

"You are going to have so much fun baby." He said to his youngest kid. "Don't worry. Just hold on for as long as you can and don't worry about falling off. It won't hurt and you have your life jacket on so you will be okay. And besides, you're with Olivia. She won't let anything happen to you."

Lizzie smiled nervously at her Dad. "Okay Dad."

He kissed her forehead gently. "Have fun love bug."

Olivia lifted her cover up over her head and handed it to Elliot. "Hang onto this for me would you?" She asked with a sly smirk.

He glared at her and clicked his tongue. "Evil woman."

She laughed and jumped in the water, splashing him slightly. She pulled herself up onto the raft and put an arm around Lizzie's back to make her feel better. Elliot walked back to where Dickie and his girls were drying off and picked up the camera to capture the moment.

Martin started off slow to ease Lizzie into it. "You okay Lizzie?"

Lizzie nodded slowly. "I'm okay."

Martin revved up the engine and started to go faster making Lizzie squeal. Olivia wrapped her arm around her tighter and laughed as they flew through the water. Finally Lizzie relaxed beside her as the raft lifted up and she finally started to have fun.

"Faster!" Lizzie yelled making Olivia laugh.

They hung on for as long as possible but when they finally hit a big enough wave, the raft flipped and they fell into the water. Olivia came up from the water and turned to look for Lizzie who was treading water laughing.

"You okay?" Olivia asked as she smiled and swam towards her.

"That was awesome!" Lizzie said as Olivia helped pull her towards the boat as it came up beside her. "I want to do it again."

Olivia laughed and lifted her up for Elliot to pull back onto the boat. "You did awesome Lizzie!" He said to her.

"That was so cool!" Lizzie said jumping up and down on the deck. "I want to go faster next time!"

Elliot laughed and wrapped her up in a towel, and then helped pull Olivia up out of the water. As annoyed as he was with they boy's comments about his daughters, they did have a point…Olivia looked even better as she came out of the lake.

"You're drooling…" Olivia whispered to him teasingly as he handed her a towel.

"Seriously…you're evil…" He said with a pout.

She winked and walked around him to look at the pictures with Lizzie. Elliot chuckled as Martin's boys walked around to the back of the boat. "Hey Dad can we have a turn?" Tim asked.

"Sure. Go ahead." Martin said.

Elliot smirked and walked over to Martin. "Hey can I try steering the boat?"

Olivia eyed him suspiciously but she just laughed as Martin stepped aside and showed him what to do. When the boys were ready, they called out to Elliot. "Go fast Mr. Stabler! We aren't afraid!" Tim yelled.

Elliot slid his sunglasses over his face and smiled. "You got it!" He called back.

He lunged forward on the boat so fast that Dickie tripped a little and fell into Olivia's lap. She scooped him up and turned to look at the boys who were holding on for dear life as Elliot flew through the water. Maureen was taking pictures trying not to fall over as she did so.

Elliot turned the boat quickly making the tube fly into the air and flip over; the boys flew backwards and slammed into the water. Martin was laughing at his sons as Elliot slowed the boat down and Kathleen glared at her Dad.

"Dad! Why'd you go so fast!" Maureen yelled at him. "Are they hurt?"

Elliot smirked and walked towards the back of the boat with Martin. "They're fine." Martin said.

They pulled the boys up onto the boat who weren't hurt but looked a little surprised. Martin walked back to the wheel and Maureen and Kathleen walked towards the back of the boat wanting to move away from their Dad.

Ethan rubbed his neck. "You sure drive a lot faster than my Dad."

Olivia tried to hold back a laugh as Elliot shrugged. "Must be from all the years I've been driving the squad car around chasing perps…"

Tim swallowed hard and grabbed a towel. "Oh yeah…maybe…"

Elliot nodded. "I mean I chase a lot of guys who think they are a lot tougher then they actually really are."

Ethan smiled nervously. "Okay…well we're going to go help our Dad out."

He smiled triumphantly and sat down next to Olivia on the bench. "Smooth Elliot…"

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled innocently. "What?"

She just laughed and shook her head as she watched the boys try and avoid the girls at all costs. Kathleen and Maureen were tanning up at the front of the boat, expecting to see the boys come over to them again. They both seemed sad yet unsurprised that they were avoiding them with their father on the prowl…

But after a few minutes they forgot all about the situation as the soaked up the sun.

* * *

An hour later, Elliot had Martin pull up to the other side of the lake near the cliff where Olivia had wanted to jump from.

"Come on…" Elliot said pulling at her hand as they pulled up to a nearby dock.

Olivia stared at him for a moment. "What are we doing?"

"You said you wanted to jump off the cliff. Why not go today?" He asked with a smile on his face.

She couldn't deny that she was nervous, but she did really want to try it. The kids all waited on the boat as Elliot and Olivia climbed the trail up towards the top of the cliff. Martin pulled the boat out further so they could all have a better view of them jump.

When they go to the top, Elliot walked to the edge and waved to the kids. He turned and smiled at Olivia who was standing a few feet away from the edge.

"I don't know about this…" She said feeling slightly panicked.

Elliot smiled and walked back towards her. "Liv would I ever let you do anything that could be dangerous?"

She stared at him for a moment and shook her head. "No."

"Exactly." He said pulling her towards the edge. "You can do this. And I'll be beside you the whole time."

Olivia took a deep breath and peered down into the water way below them. "Okay…"

He squeezed her hand and smiled reassuringly. "On the count of three?"

Licking her lips, she nodded and squeezed his hand back. "One…"

"Two…" He whispered back.

"Three!" They yelled together as they jumped out as far as possible over the edge.

Olivia could hear everyone on the boat yelling in encouragement as they plummeted towards the water. She had never felt so alive as she fell towards the water, and when she hit the water she held her breath. When she came up to the air again, she was laughing.

Elliot swam closer to her and smiled. "See you're fine."

The kids were all hooting and hollering from the boat as Olivia pulled him in for a hug. Elliot was surprised by the gesture but he held her closer and remembered how much he loved the feeling of her in his arms.

"Thank you Elliot…" She whispered into his ear.

He buried his face in her neck and whispered back. "Don't mention it…"

Deep down they both knew that she was trying to thank him for more than just getting her to jump off the cliff. And as he held her, Elliot started to truly believe that they had a chance at happiness.

* * *

That night after everyone showered and ate dinner together Elliot was setting up a sleeping back in the backyard for Dickie. Olivia walked outside with a smile on her face as she pulled on a sweater and walked over to him.

"So you're really going to make him go through with this?" She asked laughing as she stood behind him.

Elliot put the flashlight down beside the sleeping back before standing up to look at her. "It's called tough love…"

She raised an eyebrow and smirked. "How long do you think he'll last?"

Elliot scratched his stubbly face and shrugged. "Well he is my son…so he's going to be stubborn and pretend he's okay for awhile. But I give him an hour tops."

Olivia smiled and turned as she heard Dickie walking over to them. "Hey buddy…" She whispered. "You ready for bed?"

Dickie had a smile on his face trying to seem okay with the situation. "Yup. Brushed my teeth, said goodnight to Auntie Lu and Grandma. I'm ready."

She pulled him closer and kissed the top of his head. "Sweet dreams."

Dickie nodded and walked over to the sleeping back, not looking at his Dad as he slipped into it. Elliot smiled at Olivia and then knelt down beside his son and kissed his head.

"Okay…so I put new batteries in the flashlight just in case. And I brought out a water bottle in case you get thirsty. Need anything else?" He asked him as he pulled the sleeping back up around him.

Dickie lay back on the ground and shook his head. "I'm not a baby Dad. I'll be fine."

Elliot nodded. "Great. See you in the morning."

He stood up and put a hand on Olivia's back to guide her back to the house, she waved at Dickie as they went towards the back door.

"Wait!" Dickie yelled sitting up straighter.

Elliot smirked assuming his son was already chickening out as he turned back to him. "Yeah bud?"

"Is the back door locked? You know…in case I need to get something." Dickie said trying to sound casual.

Elliot shook his head. "I'll leave it open for you."

"Okay. Thanks." He lay back down on the ground and flipped on the flashlight. "Goodnight…"

"Night." Elliot and Olivia both called to him as they went back towards the house.

Once inside, Elliot walked to the kitchen. "You want a glass of wine?"

She sat down at the table and smiled. "That would be great. Thanks."

He poured two glasses and then walked back over to her, "Here you go."

She smiled and took the glass taking a sip before talking again. "I'm really glad you invited me to come with you guys Elliot. This is exactly what I needed…"

He smiled at her. "Good I'm glad. It's been great having you here."

She placed her glass down on the table and ran her finger around the rim of it. "Nice stunt you played with Martin's boys today…"

Elliot chuckled. "They were talking about how hot my girls were. They're lucky I didn't do worse."

Olivia smiled at him; she loved how protective he was of his kids. "They're growing up…"

He sighed and took a long swig of his drink. "Yeah I know. And I'm not happy about it."

She laughed. "I couldn't tell…"

He smiled and looked around the house. "It's weird…I love being here with my kids but it feels like just yesterday I was there age running around up here terrorizing everyone who lived on the lake. And now it's their turn…"

She smirked. "Lucy told me a few stories about you when you visited…"

He grimaced. "Oh Jesus…I can only imagine what she said."

Olivia laughed. "She mentioned something about untying everyone's boats on the docks sot hey floated away during the night…"

Elliot chuckled and nodded. "Yeah…not one of my better moves."

She smiled. "I can see where Dickie gets it from…"

Elliot nodded and looked out the window to see that Dickie still had the flashlight on. "Yeah I guess. I was up here without my parents that week…I think I was about eleven years old and Uncle John made me go to every house and apologize to them."

"It sounds like you were pretty close to him and Lucy." She said.

Elliot nodded. "I really was. Whenever things with my Mom and Dad were rough they would come and pick me up and I'd stay with them for a few days. It was nice to have a place to get away from the fighting for awhile…"

"I bet…" She whispered looking down at her drink, wishing she had had somewhere like that when she was younger.

"I loved my parents…still do but sometimes it was too much to take." Elliot said sighing as he pushed away his glass. "I think that's why I knew getting a divorce was the right thing to do with Kathy. I didn't want the kids to be subjected to all the fighting like I was."

"You made a really mature decision Elliot…I know it wasn't easy but you did the right thing. And the kids know that now…" She whispered reaching for his hand.

He looked down at their joined hands and couldn't help but smile. "When I was putting Lizzie to bed she said that she hoped you would be her Step-mother some day."

Her breath caught in her throat and she knew her cheeks had turned red. "She did?"

Elliot nodded and squeezed her hand, leaning in closer to her. "She loves you. All my kids do…"

She smiled and lowered her gaze to look at the table. "Well they are great kids Elliot. You know I love them too…"

"When I first divorced Kathy I didn't think I could bring another woman into their lives…but seeing you with them this week, especially today…" He shrugged and smiled honestly at her. "You're already a part of the family Liv…"

She brushed a strand of hair out of her face and took a deep breath. "And how would Kathy feel about us being together?" She paused for a moment. "If we were to be together…"

Elliot sat back in his chair and nodded. "I actually talked to her about it…and she supports it. She wants me to be happy and she knows you make me happy. And she knows you adore our kids…she said she would be okay with it."

Olivia was surprised by his answer. "She's a better woman than I am then. I don't know if I could watch my ex-husband move on with someone else. Or watch my kids with another woman…I know she has Andrew but it is a big change."

Elliot nodded and reached for his glass. "Yeah it is. But Kathy and I had a good relationship…but it wasn't meant to be forever. I know that now and I've accepted it. But I can't live in the past…and neither can she. We both deserve to be happy…she is happy with Andrew and I want to be happy with you."

Olivia rested her elbows on the table and smiled at him. "I can't make you any promises Elliot…but I really do want to try to make this work…but I need you to be patient with me." She saw the look on his face and she laughed. "Or I need you to continue to be patient with me…"

He leaned closer to her and caressed her arm. "I can do that…"

"Are you sure?" She whispered nervously. "I just…don't want you to end up hating me. I really am trying…it's just hard to change for me so quickly."

He smiled and took her hand in his; he put it up to his lips and kissed it gently. "I told you Liv…I'm not going anywhere."

She let him kiss her hand again before he let it go. "Okay…"

He winked and stood up, taking the last sip of his wine. "Okay." He walked to the sink and looked out at Dickie who appeared to be hiding inside his sleeping bag. "I don't know about you…but I'm exhausted."

Olivia stood up to stand at the window with him and laughed when she saw the light shining through the sleeping bag. "What are you going to do? You can't leave him out there alone all night…"

Elliot got that mischievous look on his face that Olivia often saw in his children when they were planning something. "Stay here…"

She turned and watched him walk towards the front door. "Where are you going?"

He didn't answer as he shut the front door behind him and crept around the side of the house. She spun around again to stare out the window to keep an eye on Dickie, wondering what Elliot was up too.

After a few moments, she heard what appeared to be howling from the side of the house. She tried to hold back a laugh when he saw Dickie's head pop up from under the sleeping bag, clutching his flashlight in his hands. She put a hand over her mouth as the howling started up again and a frightened Dickie came bolting towards the back door leaving the sleeping bag behind.

He flew through the door and ran straight to Olivia who scooped him up in his arms. "Whoa! You okay?" She asked pretending not to have heard the howling noises.

Dickie pulled away from her and peered out the window. "Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Olivia asked following his gaze out the window, she could see Elliot sneaking back into the house from the front door out of the corner of her eyes but Dickie was to preoccupied to notice.

"That howling! I think there is a wolf out there!" Dickie said pointing out the window.

"I didn't hear anything Dickie…" Olivia said feigning innocence.

Elliot walked into the kitchen and pretended to have just come from downstairs. "What's up? Why are you back in the house bud?"

Dickie glanced nervously at his Dad and jumped down from Olivia's arms. "I uh…I heard a noise and I came to make sure everyone was safe in here."

Olivia put a hand on Dickie's shoulder as he stood in front of her as Elliot stared down at his son. "Oh. I didn't hear anything. We're all fine in here."

Dickie stood up straighter, trying to seem tough. "Good. Good…"

Elliot nodded and stretched his arms. "Well I'm pretty tired. I think I'm gonna head to bed. Why don't you head back out there and I'll turn the back light off for you."

Dickie looked up at Olivia who didn't say anything so he turned and walked slowly towards the back door. His hand was on the doorknob when he turned back around and looked back at his Dad.

"Dad please don't make me go back out there…" He whispered sadly.

Elliot smiled and knelt down and put his arms out. "Of course you don't have to sleep out there Dickie."

Dickie ran towards him and hugged his Dad. "I'm sorry I scared Lizzie. I won't do it again I promise."

Elliot laughed and stood up with him still in his arms. "I'm glad you learned your lesson. It isn't fun to be scared like that. I'll take you up to bed now."

Dickie sighed with relief and looked over at Olivia. "Goodnight Livvie…"

Olivia stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on his cheek. "Goodnight buddy."

Elliot smiled at her and walked towards the stairs still carrying Dickie. When he was upstairs took their wine glasses and cleaned them in the sink thinking about how much fun she had had with Elliot and his family today. After a few minutes, he joined her in the kitchen as she was drying the glasses with a towel.

"Is he okay?" She asked turning back towards him.

Elliot chuckled and nodded. "He's fine."

She nudged him playfully. "You're so mean…"

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "Like I said…tough love." She stared up at him for a moment and then shook her head and smiled. "What?" He asked playfully as he cupped her face in his hands.

Olivia bit her lip and stepped closer to him, placing a hand on his chest she leaned up on her toes and kissed him gently on the lips. When she pulled away, she could tell that Elliot was surprised by the gesture but very happy about it too.

She let her hand slide off his chest and back to her side. "I'll see you in the morning?"

He seemed to be unable to respond for a moment but he finally nodded his head and responded. "Yeah…see you in the morning."

She smiled again and walked around him towards the hallway. Her lips were still tingling as she walked into her room and as she sat down on her bed she knew it was only a matter of time before she gave in completely. She just hoped that once they were together, her fears would melt away and she would allow herself to actually be happy…

* * *

**What did you think? Kind of just a cute one with the kids and stuff. Hope you liked it! :) **


	7. Authors Note

Hey all just sending a quick SHOUT OUT to my girl NANCY who just sent me such a ridiculous review. I deleted it but here is what she said:

**_Nancy:What's to say but YOUR A F_ _ _ING IDIOT! You must be young and not have a life. Get one and leave the writing to someone that can write._**

I just want to say Nancy…YOU MAKE ME LAUGH! I like how you think I have no life when clearly you are the one who doesn't have a life. If you have time to spend writing hateful messages to people online that you DON'T EVEN KNOW then you really have no life. If you don't like my story…I don't really care. Don't waste your time reading it and reviewing. If you have such an amazing life you should be off doing great things rather than spreading hate via the web. I never claimed to be a professional author or the best writer I know I make mistakes but I don't really give a fuck. You go and have a wonderful day Nancy continuing to spread hate Thanks for making me laugh at work where I actually help people for a living rather then tear them down…

To the rest of you readers, thanks for the KIND reviews and being respectful. I'll update soon!


	8. Chapter 6

**WARNING! THIS CHAPTER IS RATED M. So if you don't like that kind of stuff...you might want to skip this chapter.**

Anyway...I stayed up late to write this chapter so I could update before the weekend. I won't have time to write the next chapter until at least Tuesday...sorry about that but I have a lot of people visiting me this weekend and will be too busy to write. I hope you enjoy this chapter and it holds you over until then :) 

* * *

The next morning, Olivia woke up and walked out to the kitchen where Elliot was brewing some coffee. The kids were all at the table eating breakfast with Bernie and Lucy as she walked up beside him to grab a mug.

"Good morning…" She whispered smiling shyly at him.

He looked over at her, and flashed that special smile he saved for her. "Good morning…"

He lifted the coffee pot and poured some into her mug. "How did you sleep?" She asked scooping some sugar into the mug.

Elliot chuckled. "Uh well considering you kissed me right before we went to bed…I didn't sleep much at all."

She turned and shrugged. "I slept like a baby…"

When she sat down at the table, Maureen smiled at her. "Grandma and Lucy are taking us camping. She says you and Dad could use some alone time…" She said wagging her eyebrows.

Elliot sat down next to his mother. "Of course they did. Because they both like to stick their noses into other people's business."

Kathleen glared at her father. "Just like you did yesterday with Tim and Ethan?"

Everyone laughed and Elliot shook his head. "That was a completely different situation."

"No it wasn't and you know it. Thanks to you Ethan and Tim will never speak to us again." Maureen said rolling her eyes.

"Mission accomplished…" Elliot said reaching for a piece of her bacon.

Lucy chuckled. "So you don't mind if we take the kids to the camp ground today? We'd be back tomorrow afternoon."

Elliot shrugged. "It's fine with me as long as they are okay with it. I used to have a lot of fun up there with you and Uncle John."

Dickie looked nervous. "Um…are there any wolves out at this camp ground?"

"Wolves?" Lucy asked looking at her. "I've lived here since I was twenty one Dickie and I've never seen a wolf up in these parts."

He thought about it for a moment and then nodded. "Okay then. I'm okay with going camping then."

"Great." Bernie said standing up. "After breakfast why don't you guys back a bag and then we'll head out. We can go fishing to catch something for dinner tonight and everything."

The kids hurried their way through breakfast and went to go pack as Olivia and Elliot did the dishes. He was washing as she was drying and he cleared his throat nervously.

"Are you okay with us being alone here tonight?" He asked her nervously.

She smiled at him. "Yes Elliot…I don't think we need a chaperone, do you?"

He smirked at her. "No. We don't need a chaperone…because I'm hoping if we're alone I'll get another kiss."

She laughed and shook her head. "Don't get your hopes up mister…"

He smiled. "So what was the kiss for last night then?"

She took a deep breath and shrugged. "I guess it was a moment of weakness…"

"It's because you find me so irresistible…" He said turning the water off and leaning into her.

She rolled her eyes and smacked him with the towel. "God I hate you sometimes…"

"No you don't. Not even a little bit…" He said watching her walk into the living room as the kids ran back downstairs to go.

"You guys excited to go camping?" Olivia asked as she sat down on the couch.

Elliot followed her as Lizzie jumped up beside her on the couch. "I'm so excited! I can't wait!"

Elliot sat down next to Kathleen and put his arm around her. "You guys need to listen to Grandma and Auntie Lu okay? Don't give them a hard time…"

"Dad…come on…we are perfect angels!" Kathleen said with a smirk on her face.

He chuckled. "Yeah okay…"

"Oh please…what have we ever done that is that terrible?" Maureen asked her Dad.

He shrugged. "No you've never done anything to terrible but you all can be a pain in my butt from time to time."

"The feeling is mutual…" Kathleen said patting her Dad's leg.

Everyone laughed as Bernie and Lucy came downstairs with their bags. "Everyone ready to go?" Lucy asked.

"Let's hit the road!" Dickie said jumping up off the couch.

Elliot and Olivia followed them outside and he helped pack up the car. Olivia hugged each of the kids before they jumped in the car and Lucy got in the front seat to drive.

"Alright. Be good guys. Call if you need anything." Elliot said slapping the hood of the car.

"Have fun you two…" Bernie said with a smirk.

Elliot rolled his eyes and leaned in the passenger window to kiss his Mom's cheek. "Cool it Ma…"

He stepped back as they pulled out of the driveway and Olivia walked up beside him to wave to them as they left. Lucy honked the horn as they pulled down the street just as Elliot turned back to Olivia.

"So…what do you want to do today?" He asked shoving his hands in his pockets.

She looked up at the sun and took a deep breath. "I'd like to sit out for a bit. It's gorgeous."

Elliot nodded. "Alright. I think I'm gonna go for a swim."

She smiled as they walked back into the house to get ready to go outside again. When she had her bathing suit on she made her way to the backyard and saw Elliot standing on the dock looking out at the lake. She dragged one of the lounge chairs out to the dock and he turned and smiled when he saw her.

"Want to come in with me?" He asked cocking his head towards the water.

She shook her head. "Not yet. Maybe in a little while when I need to get out of the sun." She pulled her cover up off and held out some sunscreen to him. "Want to put some on my back?"

He squinted, looking her up and down in her black bikini and cleared his throat nervously. "Sure…"

She smiled and turned around, holding her hair to the side for him. She licked her lips and tried to keep calm as she felt his hands touch her back as he smoothed the lotion out across her back. Elliot felt his heart pounding in her chest as he touched her smooth skin. His hands moved from her shoulders, down the length of her back and under the straps of her bikini top.

She bit her lip as his hands moved lower and she tried to keep the flashbacks of their night together from flooding her mind. "All done…" He whispered.

Olivia let her hair fall down around her shoulders again as she turned back to him. "Thanks…"

He looked like he was in a bit of daze and she couldn't help but smile. "No problem…"

She nudged him towards the water and he laughed as he walked closer to the edge. She put the lounge chair out and then lay on her stomach, her face towards the water so she could watch him. He dived into the water making the muscles in his back and arms bulge out and she had to slip her sunglasses over her eyes to hide how much she was enjoying the view.

When he came up for air, he smirked at her and then started to swim towards the middle of the lake. Olivia sighed happily and rested her head on her arms; she closed her eyes and felt her body relax. It felt so good to be away from the city and work, she didn't realize how much she needed a break.

A few minutes later, Elliot popped up out of the water and rested his arms on the dock. "I kind of hate you right now…"

She opened her eyes and lifted her sunglasses up on top of her head. "What did I do?"

He laughed. "You're lying there in a bikini teasing me…that's what you are doing."

She laughed and rolled her eyes. "What am I supposed to do? Sit out here in a turtleneck sweater and jeans? I'd die of heat stroke!"

"It would be less difficult for me to be around you if you were wearing that…" He said chuckling.

She rested her chin in her hand and smiled at him. "You've survived for seven years being around me without jumping me…I think you'll be okay."

He groaned. "That was before I knew what it was like to be with you…"

"Oh…right." She said smiling shyly. "It was pretty good…"

He raised an eye brow at her. "Just pretty good? That's all I get? I pulled out some of my best moves that night!"

She laughed knowing he was trying to break the tension and make her feel better. "Alright, alright…it was…well it was amazing actually."

He pulled himself up onto the dock; his body was dripping and glistening in the sun as he leaned against the big post in the corner. "That it was…"

She lay her head back down on the chair and sighed. "You know I'm sorry about how I left the next morning…I just…I panicked."

He reached for the towel that he had brought out to use. "I know."

She licked her lips and sighed sadly. "To be honest…I don't know how you don't hate me. I don't get why you even invited me here…if someone did that to me I don't think I could forgive them."

He smiled at her. "I'm not going to pretend that it didn't hurt Olivia. But I know you…I know you didn't do it to try and hurt me. You were scared…and to be honest so was I. Still am a little…"

"You are?" She whispered to him.

He nodded and leaned his head against the post. "Of course. This isn't something I'm taking lightly Olivia. I know how I feel about you and I want to do this right."

She pulled herself up and walked over to sit beside him on the dock. "You're the one that has been in a serious relationship before. I don't know how all this works…" She smirked at him playfully. "I was kind of hoping that you would be the one to teach me how to handle all this…"

He laughed and shook his head. "Liv…there is no manual on how to be in a relationship. It's kind of all just a crap shoot…you hope for the best."

She pouted. "You aren't making me feel very confident here El…"

He smiled and leaned forward to grab her hand. "It's not going to be perfect Olivia. We're going to have fights and things we need to work through…but I want to make this work."

She stared at him for a moment. "I just worry that we're both so stubborn that when we fight we won't be able to apologize. And then we'll end up doing something we both regret just to be spiteful."

"Yeah we're probably going to hurt each other from time to time Olivia…but we have to take it all in stride." He said shrugging. "No relationship is perfect."

She nodded her head and moved to pull her hair up in a ponytail. "I guess you're right…"

"Don't worry so much…" He whispered. "No matter what you just need to remember that I love you. Okay?"

She smiled and nodded slowly. "Okay…"

He smiled and slid into the water again off the dock, when he popped back up, he put his hands on her legs. "Come in with me."

She felt her feet touch the water and she pretended to think it was cold. "No come on El…I don't want too."

"Come on…" He said pulling at her legs.

She tried to pull her legs back up onto the dock but he pulled her into the water before she could run away. She screeched as she fell into the water, he pulled her towards him and wrapped his arms around her waist as they floated in the water.

"Think I can get another kiss?" He asked holding her hips in his hands.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and stared at him for a moment. "I don't think you deserve one after pulling me into the lake against my will!"

He chuckled and leaned closer to her. "Oh come on…you know you want too."

She scrunched up her nose and sighed. "You are so cocky, you know that?"

He shrugged. "Just stating a fact…you want me."

Olivia leaned in closer to him and smiled as her lips met his again. "And you don't want me?"

He inhaled as he felt her so close, "Oh no…I definitely want you."

She smiled and leaned back into him, letting their lips meet again. Instead of pulling back quickly she traced his bottom lip with her tongue making him moan softly. She smiled against his lips as he gripped her hips tighter and deepened the kiss.

When she pulled away again she smiled and kissed his nose before slipping back under the water to swim away from him. He smiled when he saw her pop back up towards the middle of the lake and he swam out to her needing to hold her again. Things were definitely starting to look up.

* * *

Later that evening, Olivia was sitting in the backyard on a bench watching the sunset over the lake. Elliot had cooked her dinner and they had eaten outside, talking and laughing the whole time.

He came up beside her and sat down, handing her her glass of wine. "Here."

She smiled. "Thanks."

"I love it out here this time of night…" He said breathing in the cool air.

She leaned into him and curled her legs up under her. "It is really beautiful."

Elliot wrapped an arm around her shoulder and kissed the top of her head. "This is honestly one of my favorite places in the world. And I'm so glad that I got to share it with you."

She nuzzled his neck and breathed him in. "I feel honored that you are sharing it with me El…I've loved spending time with your family. It makes me feel like a part of your family…which is something that I've never felt before."

He squeezed her shoulder and pulled her closer. "You are a part of this family Olivia. And if I have it my way…you always will be."

She sighed and moved a little so she could look at him. "I never expected someone like you in my life Elliot. I've never had someone that actually cares about me the way you do…and the truth is I don't know how to deal with it. You know so much about me…more than anyone else has ever known about me. But I still don't know how to let you all the way in…"

He moved a strand of her hair behind her ear and tried to smile down at her. "I know it isn't easy for you Liv…and I'm not expecting you to change your life overnight. But I am in this for the long run."

She smiled and sat up straighter. "You are about to get another kiss Stabler…"

He smirked and reached up to cup her face in his hands as she leaned into him. Just as their lips met, the sun set completely and the sky began to get darker. But they didn't notice, instead Elliot pulled her closer to him. She couldn't hold back any longer, so she slipped a leg over his lap and straddled his hips.

He pulled away slightly and looked deep into her eyes. "Liv…"

She licked her lips and traced his cheek with her finger. "Yeah El?"

"You know I want this…but I don't want to rush you." He whispered.

She smiled sadly at him. "You're afraid I'll be gone in the morning aren't you?"

He laughed and shrugged. "Well…I did drive you here so unless you walk I think I'll be able to catch up to you if you do leave."

"I'm not going anywhere…" She whispered.

His eyes opened wider in surprise. "What are you saying?"

She took a deep breath and cupped his face in her hands. "I'm saying I'm more terrified than you could possibly realize El…but being here with you…" She shrugged and leaned forward to kiss him again gently. "It made me realize I don't want to be without you…"

His hand slid up her back and he couldn't keep the smile off his face. "So…are you saying we are together?"

She giggled. "I'm saying…" She paused for a moment and took a deep breath. "I'm in love with you Elliot Stabler…"

He stared at her, unable to move or even speak. He had been waiting to hear those words for longer then he could even say. To be honest, hearing those words made him more emotional then he thought he could ever possibly be. He didn't even blink as he stared at her, feeling incredibly lost in her eyes as he realized everything he wanted was right in front of him and he could finally have it.

Olivia took his silence as him changing his mind, she bit her lip nervously. "El?"

He leaned towards her again and kissed her gently. "You don't know how good it feels to hear you say that…"

She sighed in relief as he pulled her closer again. She wrapped her arms around his neck again and squealed when he picked her up off of the bench.

"What are you doing?" Olivia asked as he walked towards the back door.

He smirked and kissed her neck. "Bringing this inside…"

She gasped as he bit down on her collarbone, and pushed open the door. He carried her through the kitchen and down the hallway towards his bedroom. The door was open so he brought her to the bed and laid her down gently.

"Tell me to stop and I will…" He whispered, pulling his shirt up over his head.

She reached up and grabbed his hand, pulling him down to her. "I want this. I want us..."

Elliot leaned down over her, holding himself up by his arms. "I love you."

She slid her hand up to his face and traced his lip with her pointer finger. "I love you too…"

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her again, finally feeling at home. She grabbed his torso and rolled him over so she could straddle his hips as she pulled off her shirt and threw it onto the floor. His hands slid up her bare stomach and reached behind her to unclasp her bra.

She let the straps fall down her arms and he pulled it off, throwing it aside. He sat up and let his lips seek out her neck again before making their way down to her chest.

When his lips closed around one of her nipples she inhaled sharply and gripped his back. He felt her nails dig into his skin but he didn't care, he rolled her over again and stared down at her as his hands reached down to the button of her jeans.

She smiled and lifted her hips as he pulled her pants down over her tan legs. He threw them aside like the rest of their clothes and then hooked his fingers under the straps of her panties. She licked her lips as he pulled those down too and then continued to kiss and nip at her bare skin.

"Elliot…" She whispered feeling her skin begin to tingle from his touch.

He licked from her chest down to her belly button and smiled against her skin. "You are so sexy…so beautiful."

She ran a hand over his head and blushed. "El…"

He smiled and kissed her stomach again before moving back up to kiss her lips. She reached down to unbutton his jeans and began to push them down over his hips. Elliot stood moved to stand up and pulled his jeans all the way off, he let them fall at his feet before stepping out of them.

Then he lay back over her, and she cupped his face in her hands. "Promise you're going to say?" He whispered to her.

She lifted her head slowly to kiss him. "I promise…"

That's all he needed to hear before he slid inside of her. She whimpered and bit her lip as he rested his forehead against hers while he began to move in and out of her slowly. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, kissing him with all the passion she had.

He moaned against her lips as he slid in deeper feeling incredibly grateful to be with her again. He truly never thought he would be able to be with her again this way. She grasped his shoulder as the pleasure took over her body and she arched her back, pressing her chest into him.

"Oh God!" She screamed as he continued to move in and out of her. "Elliot…oh my God…"

He nuzzled the side of her face before leaning against the crook of her neck. He breathed her in as she slid her hands down his back making him shiver and groan against her jaw.

She flipped him over and straddled his hips as he sat up so she could sit in his lap. He wrapped his hands in her hair as hers slid under his arms to hold his back and grind further into him. He pulled her hair slightly, making her neck more exposed to him as he bit down gently.

"Elliot…" She moaned loudly. "So good…"

He lifted his hips off the bed to meet her halfway as she bounced on top of him. He felt her grasp his back again and heard her inhale sharply as her walls tightened around him. She whimpered as tears of pleasure fell from her eyes, he kissed them away and laid her back down to continue to make love to her.

He took her hands in his and held them over her head against the pillow as he continued to move inside of her. No one had ever made her feel this amazing and she couldn't keep from screaming as she felt her body begin to convulse again as another orgasm build up in her body.

"Elliot! Yes! Don't stop…" She screamed.

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her. "Look at me Liv…"

She arched her back again and let her eyes flutter open to look at him. "Elliot…baby…so good…"

"I love you…" He whispered to her again as he thrust up inside of her.

"I love you…" As the pleasure came crashing through her again she felt him spill inside of her.

He groaned and rolled over onto his side, pulling out of her. Olivia could barely catch her breath as she turned her head towards him. He was smiling as he pulled her up against his side; she rested her head on his chest and kissed it gently.

"So was that just good? Or amazing?" He asked referring to their talk before on the dock.

She laughed against his skin and rolled over on top of him. "Definitely amazing…phenomenal. Incredible…"

He smirked and pulled her face closer to his. "Glad you enjoyed it babe…"

She licked her lips and touched his face gently. "I think I could get used to this…"

"You better get used to this Liv…I'm not letting you go again." He whispered as he slid his hands onto her back and stroked her spine with his finger.

She leaned down to kiss him again. "Good to know…"

He smiled against her lips and flipped her over onto her back. Now that he had her, he couldn't get enough of her. She giggled as his lips attached to her neck again and she knew this was where she belonged…

* * *

The next morning, the sun was shining through the window as Elliot woke up. He rolled over onto his side and smiled when he saw Olivia fast asleep beside him. This was the first time he ever woke up next to her and he didn't ever want to wake up without her.

The white sheet was laying over her back, only her shoulders were visible to him. He smiled and leaned over to kiss them gently and he heard her mumble before her eyes fluttered open.

"Good morning beautiful…" He whispered moving his kisses from her shoulder to the side of her head and finally to her lips.

She smiled and slid her arm out from under her to cup his face. "Good morning."

"You're still here…" He whispered against her lips.

She smiled and kissed him again. "I'm still here…"

"Last night was incredible Liv…" He said honestly. "I was hoping that would happen while we were here…but I was starting to think it wouldn't."

She caressed his cheek and smiled. "It wasn't really part of the plan…but it felt right. This feels right…"

"Yes it does…" He said as he leaned forward to kiss her again. "Are you happy?"

"I'm happier than I've ever been El…" She whispered.

He smiled and kissed her shoulder again before sitting up. "That's all I've ever wanted Liv…to make you happy."

She reached for his arm and pulled at it gently. "Where are you going?"

He looked down at her. "I was going to make you some breakfast…"

She shook her head and pulled him back down to the bed as she rolled over on top of him. "I'm not hungry…"

When he felt her lips on his neck he shivered and looked over at the clock. "We do have a few hours to kill before the troops get back…"

She lifted her head back up and smiled mischievously. "I think I know what we can do to pass the time…"

He smirked and grabbed her hips as he flipped her over making her scream and laugh. As he held himself up over her and stared deep into her eyes, he knew that she was the one he was going to spend the rest of his life with. Everything was finally falling into place…

* * *

Later that afternoon, when they were showered and had eaten Olivia nervously pulled at his arm. They were standing in the kitchen as he pulled her in for a hug; he kissed the top of her head.

"You okay?" He asked rubbing her back gently.

She nodded against his chest and breathed him in. "Just a little nervous for your kids to get back…"

He smiled and pulled away just a little so he could see her face. "Why? They are going to be happy to know we are together finally."

She smiled and played with the hem of his shirt feeling anxious. "I know…but it's one thing for them to say they want us to be together and another for them to really accept it. I love you so much and I want them to know that I love them too…"

He leaned down and kissed her gently, he loved the way she cared so much about his kids. "Liv they know…it's okay."

She pouted and huffed. "I'm nervous…and your Mom and Aunt…I know they've been asking about us but are they okay with it?"

He laughed and cupped her face in his hands. "Of course they are. They adore you and they want me to be happy…" He pulled her face closer to his and kissed her lips and then her nose. "And you make me happy…"

She sighed and leaned back into him, holding tightly to his arms. "Okay."

"Don't worry babe." He said rocking her back and forth gently. "I'm right here…"

She breathed him in and felt herself relax in his arms just as they heard the car pull up out front. Elliot kissed the top of her head again and then started to pull away, he grabbed her hand and led her to the driveway so they could greet the them.

"Hey Dad!" Dickie called from the window as he hopped out of the car. "I caught the biggest fish ever!"

Elliot smiled as Olivia stood a little behind him; their hands were still intertwined. "That's awesome buddy! I can't wait to hear all about it!"

"We had a great time." Bernie said as she got out of the car. "I hope you didn't miss us too much."

Elliot glanced back at Olivia who had a nervous smile on her face; he winked and let go of her hand as he pulled her closer to him. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and then turned back to his kids, Mom and Aunt. "We missed you guys…but we had a good time too…"

Maureen stepped around the back of the car and smiled. "Something's different…"

He smiled at his oldest daughter and rubbed Olivia's shoulder. "Olivia and I had a long talk…and we were wondering what you guys would think about us being a couple…"

"You're serious?" Kathleen asked dropping her bag at her feet, as a huge smile erupted on her face.

Elliot nodded. "Very serious."

"So you'd be like boyfriend and girlfriend?" Lizzie asked from where she stood beside Lucy.

Elliot chuckled. "Yeah…I guess we would be."

Maureen laughed. "Finally…"

"So you're okay with it then?" Elliot asked feeling Olivia relax against his side.

"Okay with it?" Kathleen asked. "Dad we've only been waiting for it to happen since you and Mom got divorced."

"And when you said Olivia was coming on our trip with us we assumed it was because you were together already." Dickie said shrugging.

"Of course we're okay with it!" Maureen said smiling at them both. "Olivia's already part of the family but this just makes it more official!"

He smiled at his kids and looked down at Olivia. "Well I'm glad you guys approve because we are very happy…"

The four of them rushed over to Olivia and Elliot as they all hugged one another. Bernie and Lucy stood by the car, watching them happily as they started to discuss the camping trip.

"I told you all they needed was a little time alone…" Lucy said looking over at her younger sister. "You should know by now I'm always right about these things."

Bernie rolled her eyes. "Oh please…if I hadn't of talked to Olivia the other night we'd all still be waiting for them to get together. It's all thanks to me this happened."

Lucy shook her head. "You're impossible."

"I learned from you dear sister…" Bernie said winking before she walked over to her son to hug him.

Lucy stood back and watched them all walk back towards the house. She sighed happily and looked up at the sky and thought about her husband John. It was times like these she wished he was here to share these moments…but as the wind blew around her she knew that his spirit was always with her. And she also knew that Elliot and Olivia were going to be as happy as she and John had once been…

Inside the kids were showing them the pictures on the camera as Bernie started to fix up lunch for everyone. Olivia was leaning against Elliot's side as they sat together on the couch to look at the camera Maureen was holding.

He looked over at her and smiled. "Love you…" He whispered.

She winked and leaned forward to kiss him gently. "I love you too."

They turned back to the camera and Olivia couldn't' believe how comfortable she felt here with all of them. Elliot had been right…something's really were worth fighting for.

* * *

**I hope you are all happy since you've been waiting anxiously for them to get together! Have a great weekend and I will update by Tuesday for sure! No latter then that I promise! :) **


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